Ways To Win Back Your Wife
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say for your partner — I am certain you all agree!
By saying this, you are admitting that you’ve messed up and have hurt one of those people you love the most. It is never simple.
However, the thing is, we are all human and we make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes which really hurt our partners.
When this occurs, it’s our job to take responsibility for our actions and apologize, EVEN whenever your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there’s nearly “too much” to apologize for.
It’s a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the recovery process will require.
Continue below to find out what these steps are, and don’t hesitate to talk about experiences and your thoughts at the conclusion. Ways To Win Back Your Wife
5 Step to Say “I’m Sorry” and Truly Mean It. Ways To Win Back Your Wife
1. Forgive yourself
You might be thinking something like: “How on earth can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How can an apology start with ME?”
But there are numerous reasons why it’s imperative to try to make peace with yourself once you have made a mistake.
To start with, dwelling on self-loathing and remorseful thoughts will use all of your emotional energy up.
This isn’t going to be useful for your marriage or you, since it keeps the focus on the issue, rather than what you can do to FIX it. If you can accept the mistake you have made, you’ll have the ability to focus your energy on what you could do in order to compensate for it.
Allow me to be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you’re not clearing yourself of any blame… You freely admit that you have made a mistake.
But you’re also acknowledging that the behavior you’ve done wrong does not mean you’re a terrible person as a whole and you’ve got the chance to be your very best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your spouse and accept full responsibility
When it comes to saying sorry, the earlier the better. However, an apology needs to be said with feeling and real sincerity to be effective.
So you need time before you confer with your partner, take this moment to calm down. An sarcastic or angry apology will only make the situation even more worse.
As hard as it is, look at your spouse’s eyes when you go to confer with them.
For example; “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and just how disappointed and hurt you have felt when I came home late”.
Lastly, never never NEVER say “I am sorry” and follow it up with a “but” or an excuse.
For example: “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you were looking forward to going out and how frustrated and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late. BUT the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I’m busy with work and find it difficult to keep track of what’s going on occasionally”.
This will make your apology meaningless, and even indicate that you are BLAMING your spouse — that is just going to push them farther away.
So accept full responsibility for your actions… Do not try to reevaluate your error to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it will not work!) And focus just on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. Ways To Win Back Your Wife
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a plan to make certain your mistake will not be repeated in the future and communicate this to your spouse. Make sure any promises you make could be followed up on.
“I have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her out of my phone, Facebook, Twitter, and also will let you know immediately if he/she ever tries to get in contact with me.
I am happy to give you open access to all my accounts and my phone if that would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I am pleased to give you access. I promise to keep in regular communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I really wish to make this work and will do whatever is needed. I will clear my schedule outside of work so that I could spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you’re comfortable with at this time.” Ways To Win Back Your Wife
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A common assumption that a partner often makes is that when they have apologized, their husband or wife should stop being mad or sad and give them forgiveness.
And if this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I’ve just apologized! What more to you need me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can’t FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own decision.
So don’t expect anything from your spouse at the moment.
It’s true, you’re making yourself vulnerable and yes, it may feel excruciating being fulfilled by your spouse’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.
Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, despite the fact that this might be your first instinct — since it will reverse the good you have done by apologizing.
And now is definitely not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back in your partner for whatever they have done.
All you can do right now, as hard as it will be, is give your spouse time to come to terms with your apology and see for themselves the adjustments on your behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. Ways To Win Back Your Wife
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is important, but it isn’t sufficient on its own to cure your spouse’s hurt and move forward. It is the ACTIONS that follow which really do the majority of the relationship fixing.
Apologies need to get backed up with positive changes in behavior, as otherwise your spouse will lose faith in you and will become more hurt and betrayed as a result.
If you’ve betrayed your spouse in some manner, the biggest secret is to be utterly transparent with your partner in future — don’t try to hide or cover up anything.
Keep the lines of communication open and be fair about what — where you’re, what you’re doing, that you are with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.
This may seem over-the-top, but the truth is that your spouse is very likely to be feeling really vulnerable at the moment, and their hope in you has been ruined. So in order to their hope to be recovered, you need to leave literally no doubts in their mind.
And keep in mind, one big gesture of flowers and chocolates after you’ve messed up is fine, but it’s not going to get exactly the same impact as continuous small steps to improve your behavior and show your spouse how much you appreciate them.
Even if your spouse doesn’t take your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you’re through loving actions, you have the best hope of regaining their love and trust. Ways To Win Back Your Wife