Surah To Get Husband Back
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say for your spouse — I’m certain you all agree!
By saying this, you’re admitting that you have messed up and have hurt among those people that you love the most. It’s never simple.
However, the thing is, we’re all human and most of us make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes that really hurt our partners.
When this happens, it’s our job apologize and to take responsibility for our actions, EVEN when your mistake is so BIG you feel like there is nearly “too much” to apologize for.
It is true that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will require.
Continue below to learn what these steps are, and don’t hesitate to talk about experiences and your thoughts at the end. Surah To Get Husband Back
5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Truly Mean It. Surah To Get Husband Back
1. Forgive yourself
You might be thinking something like: “How on earth could I ever forgive myself?” Or “How do an apology begin with ME?”
But there are numerous reasons why it is necessary to try to make peace with yourself once you have made a mistake.
To start with, dwelling on thoughts that are self-loathing and remorseful will use up all of your emotional energy.
This is NOT going to be helpful for your marriage or you, as it keeps the focus on the PROBLEM, rather than what you can do to repair it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you will have the ability to then focus your energy on what you can do in order to compensate for it.
Let me be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you are not clearing yourself of any blame… You freely admit that you’ve made a mistake.
However, you are also acknowledging that the behavior you have done wrong does not mean you are a terrible person as a whole and you’ve got the opportunity to be your best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your partner and take full responsibility
In regards to stating sorry, the earlier the better. But, an apology has to be said with real sincerity and feeling to work.
So you will need the time to calm down before you confer with your partner, take this time. An sarcastic or angry apology is only going to make the situation even more worse.
As hard as it is, look into your partner’s eyes once you go to apologize to them.
For example; “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you have felt when I came home late”.
Lastly, never never NEVER say “I am sorry” and follow it up with a “but” or an excuse.
For instance: “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you were looking forward to heading out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I arrived home. However, the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this afternoon. You know I am busy with work and find it difficult to keep track of what’s happening occasionally”.
This will make your apology meaningless, and also imply that you are BLAMING your spouse — which is just going to push them further away.
So accept full responsibility for the actions… Do not try to downplay your mistake to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it won’t work!) And focus only on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. Surah To Get Husband Back
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a strategy to ensure your mistake won’t be repeated in the future and convey this to your spouse. Just make sure any promises you make can be followed up on.
“I will have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my phone, Facebook, Twitter, and also will let you know instantly if he/she ever tries to get in touch with me.
I’m pleased to give you open access to all my accounts and my phone if this would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I am pleased to give you open access. I promise to keep in communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I really wish to make this work and will do whatever is needed. I can clear my schedule outside of work so I can spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you are comfortable with at this time.” Surah To Get Husband Back
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A common assumption that a partner often makes is that as soon as they’ve apologized, wife or their husband should stop being sad or mad and give them forgiveness.
And when this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I’ve just apologized! What more to you need me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or wife for their forgiveness, but you can not FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own decision.
Therefore don’t expect anything from your spouse right now.
It’s true, you’re making yourself vulnerable and yes, it may feel excruciating being met angry words or by your partner’s silence. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I am sorry”.
Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, even though this may be your first instinct — as it will undo the good you have done by apologizing.
And now is definitely not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back in your spouse for whatever they have done.
All you can do now, as hard as it is, is give your spouse time to come to terms with your apology and see for themselves that the adjustments on your behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. Surah To Get Husband Back
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is vital, but it is not enough on its own to heal your spouse’s hurt and move forward. It’s the ACTIONS that follow which actually do most of the relationship repairing.
Apologies need to be backed up with positive changes in behavior, as otherwise your spouse will lose faith in you and will end up more hurt and betrayed consequently.
If you have betrayed your partner in some manner, the key is to be utterly transparent with your spouse in future — don’t attempt to hide or cover up anything.
Keep the lines of communication open and be fair about everything — where you are, what you’re doing, who you’re with, what you’re spending… EVERYTHING.
This may seem counter-intuitive, however, the truth is that your spouse is likely to be feeling very vulnerable right now, and their hope in you has been shattered. So in order for their trust to be recovered, you need to leave literally no doubts in their mind.
And remember, one big gesture of chocolates and flowers once you have messed up is nice, but it is not going to get the same effect as constant small actions to improve your behavior and reveal your spouse how much you value them.
Even if your spouse doesn’t accept your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to demonstrate how sorry you’re through loving actions, you’ve got the hope of regaining their love and trust. Surah To Get Husband Back