When facing a marriage crisis, This is certainly one of the most frequent questions spouses ask: Marriage Saving Ideas 

Can I save my marriage if my partner doesn’t want to help look for an answer…?

How do I succeed I’m attempting to save my marriage by myself…?

It is a typical enough story: one partner leaves, the other remains. One remains “in love”, the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that has caused a couple to become apart, the one person who remains bears the possibility, uncertainty, fear, desire, hope of rescuing her or his marriage’ ALONE.

Considering there are just two different people contributing to the overall health and well being of a marriage, shouldn’t both of you be present to actually try and rescue it? Or, worse, if it’s his, or her, their fault so shouldn’t he, she, they’re the ones to make amends? You’re just the victim here, afterall!

How to save a marriage

Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash

 

How You Can Save Your Marriage On Your Own Marriage Saving Ideas

The first thing you need to understand is, if you wish to save your marriage and if you find yourself alone in this need, waiting for the other partner to make the first move would be the beginning of the ending.

Again, it is going to fail if you’re seeking someone to blame or someone else to put the physical and psychological work into saving the marriage. Marriage Saving Ideas

The belief that the responsibility lies with the other individual is a self-defeating attitude. It propagates the impression that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you ought to stand and see what’s your way.

NOT correct!

There’s still something you CAN DO. Even in your loneliness and solitude, you CAN save your marriage.

How…?

Let’s begin by examining what it means to be all on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. It is a part of our genetic make up to be social creatures and develop connections with others, whether friendships or romantic interest. The way we connect with other people of how we interact with people and the nature is a basic aspect of personal and emotional development. Marriage Saving Ideas

The paradox is that as we grow older in companionship, trust, the love and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us happy human beings. Ideally, the older human person should have developed a sense of self-esteem, confidence and self-awareness as she or he reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we see the world, flaws, and all. These make up part of our personal shelter amidst challenges and difficulties. This is named SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, lots people enter into adult life without even being aware of this gorgeous, human truth. We could have experienced abandonment in our youth or been disappointed by our intimate relationships.

whatever it is, it’s caused to shift from proper mature development to fears of abandonment and the inability to see that we are able to stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many of us enter relationships and marriages with plan, the hope and dream that we’d never be alone. We {invest so much in our spouses and loved ones, focusing our entire beings on them and relying on them to make us happy and protected. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own poison.

Subconsciously, we project the responsibility of our life happiness on the other person, eloquently sidestepping taking responsibility for destiny and our own life happiness.

Problems develop when a partner indicates some kind of dissatisfaction with the relationship or the expectations unwittingly put upon them, and when they do so we panic. Our fears kick in, when our spouse leaves. If something goes wrong with our marriages, it is extremely easy for us to place the blame of another person for having made us miserable.Marriage Saving Ideas

So as to save your marriage when you are the one doing it, the key then is a paradigm shift, meaning, the important thing is to change your mindset and focus. Stop focusing on your partner – stop the blaming, halt the inaction.

Take a good look at yourself and what you can do in this moment. You can definitely NOT control your partner’s feelings, attitude and responses, but you can control your own. You can always go from fearing abandonment to really taking responsibility for yourself and your happiness.

This is where the individual truth about self-actualization comes in. Know, adapt and internalize this for yourself. Learn it. It will spell the difference not only in your marriage but in YOU.

A whole human being is not difficult to love. A happy person brings joy. In beginning with yourself, you can move from being an unhappy difficult person to a person who can provide an environment of safety, wisdom, trust and open communication.

If each of you are able to self-sustain when it comes to taking responsibility for your own life happiness, you both have much less baggage and more genuine love to bring into the relationship. Your motivation changes from being one of fear to being one of authentic love.

Rather than beat yourself up in desperation, try these tips to start your own personal transformation and lead your marriage to success:Marriage Saving Ideas

  • Breathe…
  • Smile…
  • Let go…
  • Believe that reconnection is possible…
  • See a counselor for YOURSELF not only for your marriage
  • Examine your part in contributing to the difficulties in your marriage
  • Forgive yourself…
  • Change…
  • Look after your health, beauty, and well-being…

For all you know, your partner (and you) may just rediscover the person they first fell in love with and more. For this is the type of you that would allow your partner initiate communication and to return. When that occurs, you have every opportunity to sit down with them, talk about your motivations, plans and feelings. You may even get to the issues surrounding your marital difficulties and actually start taking positive measures to work them through. Marriage Saving Ideas

In being open and older, you could also provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once again. With sincerity and all the confidence you have gathered, take these steps. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or problems, find it in you to keep showing her or him that you do and loving your partner. Marriage Saving Ideas

Through small, subtle acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t need to be gestures, they just have to be sincere. And coming from the new you.

You may be making!

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