How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say to your spouse — I’m certain you all agree!
By saying this, you are admitting that you’ve messed up and have hurt among the people you love the most. It is never simple.
However, the thing is, we are all human and we ALL make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes that really hurt our spouses.
When this occurs, it is our job to take responsibility and apologize, EVEN whenever your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there is almost “too much” to apologize for.
It is true that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will require.
Continue below to find out what these steps are, and don’t hesitate to talk about your thoughts and experiences in the end. How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready
5 Step to Say “I’m Sorry” and Really Mean It. How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready
1. Forgive yourself
You might be thinking something like: “How in the world could I ever forgive myself?” Or “How can an apology start with ME?”
But there are numerous reasons why it’s necessary to try to make peace with yourself once you have made a mistake.
To start with, dwelling on remorseful and self-loathing thoughts is going to use all of your emotional energy up.
This isn’t going to be helpful for your marriage or you, since it keeps the focus on the issue, rather than what you can do to FIX it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you’ll have the ability to focus your energy on what you could do to make up for it.
Let me be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you are not clearing yourself of any blame… You openly admit that you’ve made a mistake.
But you’re also acknowledging that the behaviour you’ve done wrong does not mean you’re a bad person as a whole and you have the chance to be your best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your spouse and take full responsibility
In regards to saying sorry, the earlier the better. However, an apology has to be said with genuine sincerity and feeling to be effective.
So you will need the time until you confer with your spouse, take this moment to calm down. An angry or sarcastic apology is only going to make the situation even more worse.
As hard as it is, look at your partner’s eyes when you go to apologize to them.
For instance; “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you were looking forward to going out and just how disappointed and hurt you have felt when I came home late”.
Lastly, never never NEVER say “I’m sorry” and follow it up with a “but” or an excuse.
For instance: “I’m so sorry I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you were looking forward to heading out and how disappointed and hurt you have to’ve felt when I arrived home. However, the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this afternoon. You know I’m busy with work and find it hard to keep track of what is happening sometimes”.
This is going to make your apology meaningless, and also imply that you are BLAMING your spouse — which is only going to push them farther away.
So accept full responsibility for the actions… Do not try to reevaluate your error to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it will not work!) And concentrate only on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a plan to ensure your mistake won’t be repeated in the future and convey this to your spouse. Just make sure any promises you make can be followed upon.
“I have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my phone, Facebook, Twitter, and also will inform you immediately if he/she ever tries to get in touch with me.
I’m pleased to give you open access to all of my account and my phone if this would be helpful to you|If this would be helpful to you, I’m happy to give you access to every one of my account and my telephone. I promise to keep in regular communication with you and from today on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I really wish to make this work and will do anything is needed. I can clear my schedule out of work so I can spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you are comfortable with at this time.” How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A frequent assumption that a spouse frequently makes is that when they’ve apologized, their husband or wife should stop being sad or mad and give forgiveness to them.
And if this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse explodes and says something along the lines of: “I have just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can’t you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can not FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their decision.
So don’t expect anything from your partner at the moment.
It’s true, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it might feel excruciating being met by your spouse’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I am sorry”.
So avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, even though this might be your first instinct — since it will reverse the good you have done by apologizing.
And now is certainly not the time to start pointing fingers and trying to get back at your partner for anything they’ve done.
All you can do now, as hard as it is, is give your partner time to come to terms with your apology and also see for themselves that the changes in your own behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is vital, but it isn’t enough on its own to cure your partner’s hurt and move forward. It’s the ACTIONS that follow that actually do most of the relationship repairing.
Apologies have to be backed up with positive changes in behaviour, as otherwise your partner will lose faith in you and will end up more hurt and betrayed as a result.
If you have betrayed your partner in some way, the key is to be ABSOLUTELY transparent with your partner in future — do not try to hide or cover anything up.
Keep the lines of communication open and be fair about everything — where you’re, what you are doing, that you are with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.
This might appear counter-intuitive, however, the simple truth is that your spouse is likely to be feeling very vulnerable at the moment, and their hope in you has been ruined. So in order to their trust to be recovered, you need to leave literally no doubts in their mind.
And keep in mind, one huge gesture of chocolates and flowers after you’ve messed up is nice, but it’s not likely to have exactly the identical impact as continuous small actions to improve your behaviour and reveal your partner how much you appreciate them.
Even if your partner does not accept your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you’re through loving actions, you have the hope of regaining their trust and love. How To Win Your Wife Back Once She Is Ready