How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say for your partner — I am certain you all agree!
By saying this, you are admitting that you’ve messed up and have hurt one of those people that you love the most. It is never easy.
But the thing is, we are all human and we make mistakes. And regrettably, sometimes we make mistakes which actually hurt our spouses.
When this occurs, it’s our job apologize and to take responsibility for our actions, EVEN when your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there is almost “too much” to apologize for.
It is a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will require.
Continue below to find out what these steps are, and don’t hesitate to talk about your own thoughts and experiences at the end. How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce
5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Really Mean It. How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce
1. Forgive yourself
You could be thinking something like: “How in the world could I ever forgive myself?” Or “How can an apology start with ME?”
However there are several reasons why it is necessary to attempt to make peace with yourself after you have made a mistake.
To start with, dwelling on thoughts that are remorseful and self-loathing is going to use up all of your emotional energy.
This isn’t going to be helpful for your marriage or you, as it keeps the focus on the PROBLEM, rather than what you can do to FIX it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you’ll have the ability to then focus your energy on what you can do to make up for it.
Allow me to be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you’re not clearing yourself of any blame… You openly admit that you’ve made a mistake.
However, you are also acknowledging that the behavior you have done wrong does not mean you’re a terrible person as a whole and you’ve got the opportunity to be your best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your spouse and take full responsibility
In regards to saying sorry, the earlier the better. But, an apology has to be said with genuine sincerity and feeling to work.
So you need time before you apologize to your partner, take this moment to calm down. An angry or sarcastic apology is only going to make the situation even more worse.
As difficult as it can, look into your partner’s eyes once you go to confer with them.
For instance; “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you have felt when I came home late”.
Lastly, never never NEVER say “I’m sorry” and follow this up with a “but” or an excuse.
For example: “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I arrived home late. However, the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I’m busy with work and find it difficult to keep track of what’s going on sometimes”.
This is going to make your apology meaningless, and also imply that you are BLAMING your spouse — which is only going to push them farther away.
So take full responsibility for the actions… don’t try to downplay your mistake to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it will not work!) And concentrate just on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a strategy to make certain your mistake will not be repeated in the future and communicate this to your spouse. Just make sure any promises you make could be followed upon.
“I will have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her out of my telephone, Facebook, Twitter, and will inform you instantly if he/she tries to get in touch with me.
I am pleased to give you access to all my accounts and my phone if that would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I’m happy to give you access to every one my account and my telephone. I promise to keep in regular communication with you about what I am doing and from today on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I really want to make this work and will do whatever it takes. I can clear my schedule outside of work so that I could spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you’re comfortable with at this time.” How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A frequent assumption that a partner often makes is that when they have apologized, wife or their husband should stop being sad or angry and give them forgiveness.
And if this does not happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I have just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or wife for their forgiveness, but you can’t FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own decision.
So don’t expect anything from your spouse right now.
It’s true, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it may feel excruciating being met by your partner’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.
Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, even though this may be your first instinct — since it is only going to undo the good you have just done by apologizing.
And now is certainly not the time to start pointing fingers and trying to get back at your spouse for anything they have done.
All you can do right now, as hard as it will be, is give your spouse time to come to terms with your apology and see for themselves the changes on your own behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is vital, but it isn’t sufficient on its own to heal your spouse’s hurt and move forward. It is the ACTIONS that follow that really do most of the relationship fixing.
Apologies have to get backed up with favorable changes in behavior, as otherwise your spouse will lose faith in you and will end up more hurt and betrayed as a result.
If you have betrayed your partner in some way, the biggest secret is to be ABSOLUTELY transparent with your spouse in future — do not attempt to hide or cover up anything.
Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about what — where you’re, what you’re doing, that you’re with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.
This might appear counter-intuitive, however, the simple truth is that your partner is very likely to be feeling really vulnerable at the moment, and their hope in you has been shattered. So in order to their hope to be recovered, you have to leave literally zero doubts in their own mind.
And keep in mind, one huge gesture of flowers and chocolates once you’ve messed up is nice, but it’s not likely to get exactly the identical impact as continuous small actions to improve your behaviour and reveal your spouse how much you value them.
Even if your spouse doesn’t take your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you are through loving actions, you’ve got the best hope of regaining their trust and love. How To Win Your Wife Back From Divirce