Certainly one of the most common questions spouses ask when facing a marriage crisis is this: How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles 

How can I save my marriage if my partner doesn’t wish to help find an answer…?

How do I succeed I am attempting to save my marriage on my own…?

It is a standard enough story: one partner leaves, the other stays. One remains “in love”, the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that’s caused a couple to become apart, the one person who remains bears the prospect, fear, doubt, desire, hope of saving their marriage’ ALONE.

Considering there are two different people causing the total well being and health of a marriage, shouldn’t both of you be present to actually try and save it? Or, worse, if it’s his, or her, their fault shouldn’t he, she, they be the ones to make amends? You’re only the victim here, afterall!

How to save a marriage

Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash

 

How You Can Save Your Relationship On Your Own How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

The very first thing you must know is, if you end up alone in this need and if you would like to rescue your marriage, waiting for the other spouse to make the initial move would be the start of the ending.

Again, it is likely to fail if you are seeking someone to blame or someone else to put the physical and psychological work in to saving the marriage. How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

The belief that the responsibility lies with another person is a self-defeating mindset. It propagates the impression that there is NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you ought to stand and see what’s your way.

NOT true!

There is still something that you are able to DO. Even in solitude and your loneliness, you CAN save your marriage.

How…?

Let’s begin first by analyzing what it means to be on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. It’s part of our genetic make up to be social creatures and develop connections with others, whether through friendships or romantic interest. The way we connect with others of how we interact with individuals and the nature is a fundamental aspect of emotional and personal development. How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

The paradox is that as we grow older in trust, the love, companionship and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us happy human beings. Ideally, the older person should have developed a sense of self-esteem, confidence and self-awareness as he or she reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we view the world, flaws and all. These make up part of our personal shelter amidst difficulties and challenges. This is named SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, lots people enter into adult life without being conscious of this gorgeous, human truth. We could have experienced abandonment in our youth or been disappointed by our intimate relationships.

whatever it is, it has caused to shift from appropriate adult development to fears of abandonment and the inability to see that we can stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many people enter relationships and marriages with plan, the hope and dream that we’d never be lonely. We {invest so much in our partners and loved ones, focusing our whole beings on them and relying on them to make us happy and protected. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own poison.

Subconsciously, we project the responsibility of our own life happiness on the other person, eloquently sidestepping taking responsibility for our life happiness and destiny.

Problems develop when a spouse indicates some form of dissatisfaction with the relationship or the expectations unwittingly put upon them, and when they do so we panic. When our spouse leaves, our fears kick in. When something goes wrong with our marriages, it is very easy for us to put the blame of another person for having made us miserable.How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

So as to save your marriage when you are the only one doing it, the key is a paradigm shift, meaning, the important thing is to change your attitude and focus. Stop focusing on your partner – stop the blaming, stop the inaction.

Take a good look at yourself and what you can do in this moment. You can definitely NOT control your partner’s feelings, attitude and reactions, but you can control your own. You can always go from fearing abandonment to really taking responsibility for yourself and your own happiness.

This is where the individual truth about self-actualization comes in. Understand, internalize and adapt this on your own. Learn it. It will spell the difference not only in your marriage but in YOU.

A whole human being is not difficult to love. A happy person brings joy. In starting with yourself, you can move from being an unhappy, clingy, hard person to one who can offer an environment of security, wisdom, trust and communication.

If each of you are able to self-sustain when it comes to taking responsibility for your own life happiness, you both have less bags and more real love to bring in the relationship. Your motivation changes from being one of fear to being one of authentic love.

Try these tips to start your own personal transformation and lead your marriage to success, rather than beat yourself up in Despair:How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

  • Breathe…
  • Smile…
  • Let go…
  • Believe that reconnection is possible…
  • See a counselor for YOURSELF not just for your marriage
  • Examine your part in contributing to the issues in your marriage
  • Forgive yourself…
  • Change…
  • Look after your health, beauty, and well-being…

For all you know, your spouse (and you) may just rediscover the person that they first fell in love with and more. For this is the type of you that would enable your partner to return and initiate communication. When that occurs, you have every opportunity to sit down with him or her, discuss your motivations, plans and feelings. You may even get to the issues surrounding your marital issues and actually begin taking positive steps to work them through. How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

In being open and older, you could provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once again. With sincerity and all the confidence you have gathered, take these steps. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or problems, find it to continue showing him or her that you do and loving your spouse. How To Save Your Marriage When Money Troubles

Through small acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t need to be gestures, they just have to be sincere. And coming from the new you.

You might be making!

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