In the middle of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked concerning what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
A number of men in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items like their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of shoes. To every one of these guys, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these individuals or items was rewarding and simple to keep.
A range of girls believed kitchen appliances, favourite shoes or clothes, older friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with things they utilized in their own lives. Words like reliable, reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn came to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple demands, requiring food, shelter, and love. No matter how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it’s very humbling once you think about it. How To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
I have no idea of any others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of the house or regardless of how my day has been. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without requirements. It’s the type of love that you have for the partner once the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand by now your partner has flaws. You understand your spouse isn’t perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your partner because of those imperfections rather than in spite of them.
This is unconditional love.How To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you’re exactly the exact same. You’ve got flaws. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections that people have.
What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us mess our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our issues become bigger than they actually are and dominate our own lives.
If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage that the secret is in finding ways to put the emotional clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is fine to have faults and make mistakes. It is okay to have feelings and thoughts. But above all this is the love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It’s possible to not enjoy your spouse or perhaps not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for the spouse and your marriage can remain constant.
It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
Final ThoughtsHow To Save Your Marriage After Domestic Violence
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