In the middle of a workshop recently a important question was asked concerning what generates the ideal relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with some thing in the last week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of sneakers. To each of these men, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these individuals or objects was rewarding and simple to maintain.

A number of women believed kitchen appliances, favorite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their lives, and the bond that they had created either between individuals or with items they utilized in their lives. Words like trustworthy reliable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn came to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple needs, requiring shelter, food, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I’m greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is quite humbling once you think about it. How To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

I have no idea of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from the house or regardless of how my day was. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

 

Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without requirements. It’s the kind of love that you have for the partner when the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your spouse has flaws. You realize your spouse isn’t perfect. You realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse because of those imperfections rather than despite of those.

That really is unconditional love.How To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

The same thing applies to you however in taking a look at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you are exactly the same. You have flaws. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections that people have.

So what do you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let’s problems become bigger than they really are and rule our own lives.

If you are serious about saving your marriage the key is in finding methods to place the psychological mess to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is fine to possess flaws and make mistakes. It’s okay to have feelings and thoughts. But over all this is your love you have for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love will conquer them all.

It’s possible to not enjoy your partner or not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.

It is the right time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save Your Marriage After Addiction

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