In the middle of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked concerning what generates the perfect relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week that in one’s head was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and simple to keep.

A number of women believed kitchen appliances, favourite clothes or shoes, old friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had created either between individuals or with items they used in their lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and comforting were used.

When my turn came to identify my perfect relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has quite simple demands, requiring shelter, only food, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, also it is very humbling when you consider it. How To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

I have no idea of any others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from the house or no matter how my day was. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

 

Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?How To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without requirements. It’s the type of love that you have for your partner when the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your spouse has flaws. You realize your spouse is not perfect. You understand your spouse makes mistakes but that’s fine, although you realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse because of the imperfections instead of despite of those.

That really is unconditional love.How To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

The identical thing applies for you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you’re the exact same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections that people have.

What exactly can you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues become larger than they really are and dominate our own lives.

If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage the secret is in finding ways to place the psychological mess to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to possess flaws and make mistakes. It’s fine to have thoughts and feelings. But over all this is your love you’ve got for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It’s possible to not like your spouse or not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.

It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save Your Marriage After 30 Years

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