In the middle of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what generates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save My Marriage Worksheet

A number of guys in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these men, these items felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and simple to maintain.

A number of girls believed kitchen appliances, favorite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their lives, and the bond that they had created either between individuals or with items they used in their lives. Words such as reliable, dependable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple needs, requiring meals, shelter, and love. No matter how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I’m greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, also it is very humbling once you consider it. How To Save My Marriage Worksheet

I have no idea of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of the house or regardless of how my day was. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Save My Marriage Worksheet

 

So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save My Marriage Worksheet

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It is the kind of love that you have for your partner when the romantic, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You understand chances are your partner has faults. You know your partner isn’t perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes but that’s fine, although you know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your partner because of those imperfections instead of despite of those.

This really is unconditional love.How To Save My Marriage Worksheet

The same thing applies to you however in taking a look at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you’re exactly the exact same. You have flaws. You are not perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also hope unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections which people have.

So what can you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all mess our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our difficulties become larger than they really are and dominate our lives.

If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage that the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is fine to have faults and make mistakes. It is okay to have thoughts and feelings. But above all this is the love you have for your spouse, the love you have for one another. And love will conquer them all.

It is possible to not enjoy your partner or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.

It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save My Marriage Worksheet

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save My Marriage Worksheet

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