In the center of a workshop recently a important question was asked concerning what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

A number of men in the group thought of the cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items like their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of sneakers. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these individuals or items was rewarding and easy to maintain.

A range of women considered kitchen appliances, favored clothes or shoes, old friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with items they utilized in their lives. Words like dependable reliable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple demands, requiring food, shelter, and love. No matter how my day was or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s very humbling when you consider it. How To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

I don’t know of any others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of the house or no matter how my day was. His demands are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

 

Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without conditions. It’s the type of love that you have for the partner once the romantic, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You understand by now your partner has faults. You realize your partner is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay, although you know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse due to those imperfections rather than in spite of them.

This really is unconditional love.How To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

The identical thing applies to you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You admit that you’re exactly the exact same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.

So what do you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let’s problems become larger than they really are and dominate our own lives.

If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage that the key is in finding ways to place the psychological mess to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to possess flaws and make errors. It’s fine to have feelings and thoughts. But above all of this is the love you have for your spouse, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer them all.

It’s possible to not enjoy your spouse or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your own life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.

It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save My Marriage When He Doesn’t Want To

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