In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked concerning what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week that in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and also to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save My Marriage On My Own

A number of men in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these items felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or items was rewarding and easy to maintain.

A range of women believed kitchen appliances, preferred clothes or shoes, old friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had created either between individuals or with items they utilized in their lives. Words such as reassuring, trustworthy, and reliable were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has very simple demands, requiring shelter, meals, and love. No matter how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, also it’s quite humbling once you think about it. How To Save My Marriage On My Own

I don’t know of any others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from no matter how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save My Marriage On My Own

 

So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save My Marriage On My Own

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without requirements. It’s the kind of love that you have for the partner when the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You understand by now your spouse has flaws. You know your partner isn’t perfect. You realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you understand your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your partner due to the imperfections rather than despite of them.

This is unconditional love.How To Save My Marriage On My Own

The same thing applies to you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you’re exactly the same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections that people have.

So what do you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us mess our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let’s difficulties become larger than they really are and rule our own lives.

If you are serious about saving your marriage the key is in finding methods to put the psychological mess to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is fine to have faults and make mistakes. It is fine to have thoughts and feelings. But above all of this is the love you’ve got for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It is possible to not like your partner or maybe not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage can remain constant.

It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Save My Marriage On My Own

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save My Marriage On My Own

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