In the center of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked concerning what generates the ideal relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the last week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save A Second Marriage
A number of men in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of sneakers. To every one of these guys, these items felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and simple to keep.
A number of women believed kitchen appliances, favorite shoes or clothes, old friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had generated either between individuals or with things they used in their own lives. Words like dependable, reliable, and comforting were used.
When my turn came to identify my perfect relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has simple needs, requiring shelter, meals, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it’s very humbling once you think about it. How To Save A Second Marriage
I don’t know of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or regardless of how my day was. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Second Marriage
So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Second Marriage
Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without requirements. It’s the type of love that you have for your partner once the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You know chances are your spouse has faults. You know your spouse isn’t perfect. You realize your spouse makes mistakes but that is fine, although you realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your spouse due to the imperfections instead of in spite of them.
This is unconditional love.How To Save A Second Marriage
The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You admit that you’re the same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes sometimes, but that is okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections which people have.
So what do you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all mess our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let’s problems become larger than they actually are and dominate our lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage that the secret is in finding methods to place the psychological mess to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to have faults and make mistakes. It is fine to have thoughts and feelings. But above all this is the love you’ve got for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer them all.
It is possible to not like your spouse or maybe not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.
It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Second Marriage
Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Second Marriage
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