In the center of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked concerning what generates the perfect relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the last week which in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and also to think of what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

A number of guys in the group thought of the cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items like their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these men, these items felt easy, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and simple to keep.

A range of women believed kitchen appliances, favorite shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had created either between people or with items they utilized in their lives. Words like dependable reliable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn arrived to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has simple needs, requiring meals, shelter, and love. No matter how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it’s very humbling once you consider it. How To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

I don’t know of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day was. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

 

Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You understand chances are your spouse has faults. You realize your partner is not perfect. You know your partner makes mistakes but that is fine, although you realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your partner because of those imperfections rather than despite of them.

This really is unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

The same thing applies for you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You admit that you’re the exact same. You have flaws. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections which people have.

What exactly do you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let’s issues become bigger than they actually are and dominate our own lives.

If you’re serious about saving your marriage the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is okay to possess flaws and make errors. It is fine to have feelings and thoughts. But above all of this is your love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer them all.

It is possible to not like your partner or maybe not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for the spouse and your marriage can remain constant.

It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Marriage With A Depressed Spouse

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