In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with some thing in the last week which in one’s head was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How To Save A Marriage On Your Own

A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these guys, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and easy to keep.

A number of women believed kitchen appliances, favorite shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their lives, and the bond which they had generated either between people or with things they used in their lives. Words like reliable, reliable, and comforting were used.

When my turn arrived to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple needs, requiring shelter, just food, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s very humbling when you think about it. How To Save A Marriage On Your Own

I have no idea of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of the house or no matter how my day was. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage On Your Own

 

Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Marriage On Your Own

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without conditions. It’s the type of love that you have for your partner once the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your partner has flaws. You understand your spouse is not perfect. You understand your spouse makes mistakes but that is fine, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse due to the imperfections as opposed to despite of them.

This is unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage On Your Own

The same thing applies to you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the exact same. You’ve got flaws. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that is okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections which people have.

So what do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our difficulties become bigger than they really are and dominate our own lives.

If you are serious about saving your marriage that the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to possess flaws and make mistakes. It’s fine to have thoughts and feelings. But over all of this is the love you have for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It’s possible to not enjoy your partner or perhaps not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.

It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Marriage On Your Own

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Marriage On Your Own

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