In the middle of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week that in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or items was rewarding and easy to keep.
A range of girls believed kitchen appliances, favorite shoes or clothes, older friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond which they had created either between people or with things they used in their own lives. Words like reassuring, trustworthy, and reliable were used.
When my turn came to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has very simple demands, requiring shelter, food, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it’s quite humbling when you think about it. How To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
I have no idea of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of regardless of how my day was or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without requirements. It’s the kind of love that you have for the partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize by now your spouse has faults. You understand your partner is not perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine, although you understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your partner because of the imperfections rather than despite of those.
This is unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
The identical thing applies to you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You’ve got flaws. You are not perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections which people have.
So what do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let’s difficulties become bigger than they actually are and dominate our own lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage the secret is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is fine to have faults and make errors. It’s okay to have thoughts and feelings. But over all this is the love you have for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer all of them.
It is possible to not like your spouse or not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for the spouse and your marriage can remain constant.
It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Marriage In Less Than 60 Days
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