In the center of a workshop recently a important question was asked about what creates the perfect relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week which in one’s head was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
A number of guys in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items like their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of sneakers. To every one of these guys, these items felt easy, and comfortable. The relationships they had with these individuals or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.
A range of women considered kitchen appliances, preferred shoes or clothes, older friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with things they used in their own lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple needs, requiring meals, shelter, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I’m greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it’s quite humbling once you consider it. How To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
I don’t know of some others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from regardless of how my day was or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without requirements. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand by now your spouse has flaws. You realize your spouse is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes but that is fine, although you understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse due to those imperfections as opposed to in spite of them.
That really is unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
The same thing applies to you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you’re exactly the same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you also hope unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections which people have.
What exactly do you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let’s problems become bigger than they actually are and dominate our own lives.
If you’re serious about saving your marriage the secret is in finding ways to put the psychological mess to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make errors. It’s fine to have thoughts and feelings. But above all this is your love you have for your spouse, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer all of them.
It’s possible to not like your spouse or not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.
It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Marriage From An Emotional Affair
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