In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week that in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save A Marriage After Depression

A number of guys in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with such people or objects was rewarding and easy to keep.

A range of women believed kitchen appliances, preferred clothes or shoes, old friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had created either between individuals or with items they used in their lives. Words such as dependable, reliable, and comforting were used.

When my turn came to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has rather simple demands, requiring meals, shelter, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I’m greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it is quite humbling once you think about it. How To Save A Marriage After Depression

I don’t know of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from regardless of how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage After Depression

 

So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Marriage After Depression

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without requirements. It’s the type of love that you have for your partner once the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You understand chances are your partner has flaws. You know your spouse is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your spouse due to those imperfections instead of in spite of them.

That really is unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage After Depression

The same thing applies to you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are exactly the exact same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections that people have.

What exactly can you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us mess our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let’s problems become larger than they really are and rule our own lives.

If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage the key is in finding methods to put the emotional clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make errors. It is okay to have thoughts and feelings. But over all this is the love you’ve got for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer them all.

It’s possible to not like your partner or not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage can remain constant.

It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Marriage After Depression

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Marriage After Depression

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