In the center of a workshop lately a important question was asked about what generates the perfect relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week that in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and also to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save A Marriage After Abuse

A number of men in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with such people or objects was rewarding and easy to keep.

A number of women believed kitchen appliances, favourite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had created either between people or with items they utilized in their lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and comforting were used.

When my turn came to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has simple needs, requiring shelter, just meals, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, also it’s quite humbling when you think about it. How To Save A Marriage After Abuse

I have no idea of some others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage After Abuse

 

Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Marriage After Abuse

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without conditions. It is the kind of love that you have for your partner once the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You know chances are your spouse has flaws. You understand your spouse is not perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes but that is fine, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your partner because of the imperfections as opposed to despite of those.

This is unconditional love.How To Save A Marriage After Abuse

The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you are the same. You have flaws. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections that people have.

So what can you get from this then? Should we all go out and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us mess our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let’s issues become larger than they actually are and rule our lives.

If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It’s fine to possess flaws and make mistakes. It’s okay to have feelings and thoughts. But above all this is your love you’ve got for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer them all.

It’s possible to not like your partner or maybe not like what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for the spouse and your marriage might stay constant.

It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Marriage After Abuse

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save A Marriage After Abuse

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