In the middle of a workshop lately a important question was asked about what creates the perfect relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the previous week which in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How To Save A Failing Marriage Alone
A number of guys in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To every one of these men, these things felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such individuals or items was rewarding and easy to keep.
A range of women believed kitchen appliances, favourite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond which they had created either between individuals or with things they utilized in their lives. Words such as dependable reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn came to identify my perfect relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has simple demands, requiring shelter, just food, and love. No matter how my day was or what sort of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s quite humbling when you consider it. How To Save A Failing Marriage Alone
I don’t know of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from no matter how my day was or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A Failing Marriage Alone
So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A Failing Marriage Alone
Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without requirements. It’s the kind of love that you have for your partner once the amorous, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize chances are your spouse has faults. You understand your spouse isn’t perfect. You realize your spouse makes mistakes but that is fine, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your partner because of the imperfections rather than in spite of them.
This really is unconditional love.How To Save A Failing Marriage Alone
The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you’re the same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections that people have.
What exactly do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues become bigger than they really are and dominate our own lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage that the secret is in finding methods to put the emotional clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is fine to have faults and make errors. It’s okay to have thoughts and feelings. But above all this is your love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you have for one another. And love will conquer all of them.
It’s possible to not enjoy your spouse or not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage can remain constant.
It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A Failing Marriage Alone
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