In the center of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked concerning what creates the perfect relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week that in one’s head was the perfect relationship, and to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Save A 35 Year Marriage

A number of guys in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects like their television recliner chair, or favourite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these items felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and simple to keep.

A range of girls believed kitchen appliances, favored clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had generated either between individuals or with items they used in their lives. Words like reassuring, dependable, and reliable were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has quite simple demands, requiring shelter, meals, and love. No matter how my day was or what sort of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is very humbling when you consider it. How To Save A 35 Year Marriage

I don’t know of some others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of no matter how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Save A 35 Year Marriage

 

So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Save A 35 Year Marriage

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your spouse has flaws. You realize your partner is not perfect. You know your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is okay, although you understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your spouse due to the imperfections instead of despite of those.

This is unconditional love.How To Save A 35 Year Marriage

The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the exact same. You’ve got faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that is okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.

What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our difficulties become bigger than they actually are and rule our lives.

If you’re serious about saving your marriage the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to possess flaws and make errors. It is fine to have feelings and thoughts. But over all this is the love you’ve got for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It is possible to not enjoy your partner or not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for the spouse and your marriage can stay constant.

It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Save A 35 Year Marriage

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Save A 35 Year Marriage

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