In the middle of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked concerning what generates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week which in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these guys, these things felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and simple to maintain.
A number of women considered kitchen appliances, favored shoes or clothes, old friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with items they used in their lives. Words like trustworthy, reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn came to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple demands, requiring meals, shelter, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s quite humbling once you consider it. How To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
I have no idea of some others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from regardless of how my day has been or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without requirements. It is the type of love that you have for your partner once the amorous, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the amorous love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You know by now your spouse has faults. You realize your spouse is not perfect. You realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you understand your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your spouse due to those imperfections as opposed to despite of them.
That really is unconditional love.How To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the exact same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that is okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections that people have.
What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let’s difficulties become bigger than they really are and dominate our own lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage that the key is in finding methods to place the emotional clutter to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make mistakes. It’s okay to have thoughts and feelings. But above all this is your love you have for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer them all.
It’s possible to not enjoy your partner or maybe not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.
It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
Final ThoughtsHow To Keep A Marriage From Falling Apart
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