How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say to your spouse — I’m certain you agree!
By saying this, you’re admitting that you have messed up and have hurt one of the people you love the most. It is never easy.
But the thing is, we are all human and we make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes that really hurt our spouses.
When this happens, it’s our job apologize and to take responsibility, EVEN when your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there is almost “too much” to apologize for.
It’s a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will require.
Continue below to find out what these steps are, and feel free to share experiences and your own thoughts at the conclusion. How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back
5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Really Mean It. How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back
1. Forgive yourself
You might be thinking something like: “How in the world can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How do an apology start with ME?”
But there are several reasons why it is necessary to try to make peace with yourself after you have made a mistake.
To start with, dwelling on thoughts that are remorseful and self-loathing will use all of your emotional energy up.
This is NOT going to be useful for your marriage or you, as it keeps the focus on the PROBLEM, rather than what you can do to FIX it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you’ll have the ability to focus your energy on what you could do to make up for it.
Allow me to be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you’re not clearing yourself of any blame… You openly admit that you have made a mistake.
However, you are also acknowledging that the behaviour you’ve done wrong does not mean you’re a bad person as a whole and you have the chance to be your very best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your partner and take full responsibility
In regards to stating sorry, the earlier the better. But, an apology needs to be said with genuine sincerity and feeling to work.
So you will need the time before you confer with your partner, take this time to calm down. An angry or sarcastic apology is only going to make the situation even more worse.
As hard as it is, look into your partner’s eyes once you go to apologize to them.
For instance; “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late”.
Last, never never NEVER say “I’m sorry” and follow this up with a “but” or an excuse.
For instance: “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you had been looking forward to heading out and how disappointed and hurt you have to’ve felt when I arrived home. BUT the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I’m busy with work and find it difficult to keep track of what’s happening sometimes”.
This will make your apology meaningless, and even indicate that you’re BLAMING your partner — that is only going to push them further away.
So take full responsibility for the actions… Do not try to reevaluate your error to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it won’t work!) And concentrate only on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a strategy to make certain your mistake won’t be repeated in the future and convey this to your spouse. Make sure any promises you make can be followed upon.
“I will have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my telephone, Facebook, Twitter, and will let you know instantly if he/she tries to get in contact with me.
I am happy to give you access to all my account and my telephone if this would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I’m happy to offer you open access. I promise to keep in communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I truly wish to make this work and will do whatever it takes. I will clear my schedule out of work so that I could spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you’re comfortable with at this time.” How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A common assumption that a spouse often makes is that as soon as they have apologized, their husband or wife should stop being angry or sad and give forgiveness to them.
And if this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I’ve just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can’t FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own choice.
Therefore don’t expect anything from your spouse at the moment.
It’s true, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it might feel excruciating being met by your partner’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.
Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, despite the fact that this might be your first instinct — since it will undo the good you have just accomplished by apologizing.
And now is definitely not the time to start pointing fingers and trying to get back in your partner for whatever they’ve done.
All you can do right now, as hard as it is, is give your partner time to come to terms with your apology and see for themselves the changes on your behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is vital, but it isn’t sufficient on its own to heal your partner’s hurt and move forward. It’s the ACTIONS that follow which really do most of the relationship repairing.
Apologies have to be backed up with positive changes in behaviour, as otherwise your partner will eliminate faith in you and also will end up more hurt and betrayed consequently.
If you have betrayed your spouse in some manner, the biggest key is to be ABSOLUTELY transparent with your partner in future — do not try to hide or cover anything up.
Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about everything — where you’re, what you’re doing, who you are with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.
This might appear over-the-top, but the simple truth is that your spouse is very likely to be feeling really vulnerable at the moment, and their trust in you has been shattered. So in order to their hope to be regained, you need to leave literally zero doubts in their mind.
And keep in mind, one huge gesture of flowers and chocolates after you’ve messed up is fine, but it’s not likely to get the same impact as continuous small actions to improve your behavior and show your partner how much you appreciate them.
Even if your partner doesn’t accept your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you are through loving actions, you have the hope of regaining their love and trust. How To Get Ur Ex Husband Back