How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say for your partner — I am sure you all agree!

By saying this, you are admitting that you have messed up and have hurt one of those people you love the most. It’s never simple.

But the thing is, we are all human and we ALL make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes that actually hurt our spouses.

When this occurs, it’s our job to take responsibility for our actions and apologize, EVEN when your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there’s nearly “too much” to apologize for.

It’s a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the recovery process will require.

Continue below to find out what these steps are, and feel free to talk about experiences and your thoughts at the conclusion. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Truly Mean It. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

1. Forgive yourself

You might be thinking something like: “How on earth can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How can an apology begin with ME?

But there are numerous reasons why it’s necessary to try to make peace with yourself once you’ve made a mistake.

First of all, dwelling on self-loathing and remorseful thoughts will use all of your emotional energy up.

This is NOT going to be helpful for your marriage or you, since it keeps the focus on the issue, rather than what you can do to FIX it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you will have the ability to then focus your energy on what you could do in order to make up for it.

Let me be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you are not clearing yourself of any blame… You freely admit that you have made a mistake.

However, you are also acknowledging that the behavior you’ve done wrong does not mean you’re a bad person as a whole and you’ve got the opportunity to be your very best self from now on…

 

 

2. Apologize to your spouse and take full responsibility

In regards to stating sorry, the sooner the better. But, an apology needs to be said with real sincerity and feeling to work.

So you need the time to calm down before you confer with your spouse, take this moment. An sarcastic or angry apology will make the situation even more worse.

As difficult as it is, look at your spouse’s eyes once you go to apologize to them.

For instance; “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late”.

Last, never never NEVER say “I am sorry” and follow it up with a “but” or an excuse.

For example: “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you were looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I arrived home. BUT the reason I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this afternoon. You know I’m busy with work and find it hard to keep track of what’s going on sometimes”.

This is going to make your apology meaningless, and even indicate that you’re BLAMING your spouse — which is just going to push them farther away.

So accept full responsibility for your actions… don’t attempt to downplay your mistake to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it won’t work!) And concentrate just on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

3. Make promises for the future

Come up with a plan to make certain your mistake will not be repeated in the future and communicate this to your partner. Just make sure any promises you make can be followed upon.

For example:

“I have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her out of my telephone, Facebook, Twitter, and also will let you know instantly if he/she tries to get in touch with me.

I’m pleased to give you access to all my accounts and my phone if that would be helpful to you|If this would be helpful to you, I am happy to give you access to all of my accounts and my telephone. I promise to keep in communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.

I really want to make this work and will do whatever is needed. I can clear my schedule outside of work so that I can spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you are comfortable with at this time.” How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

4. Accept your spouse’s reaction

A common premise that a spouse frequently makes is that as soon as they’ve apologized, their husband or wife should stop being mad or sad and give them forgiveness.

And if this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I have just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”

The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can not FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their choice.

Therefore don’t expect anything from your spouse right now.

Yes, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it might feel excruciating being fulfilled by your partner’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.

Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, despite the fact that this might be your initial instinct — as it is only going to reverse the good you have just done by apologizing.

And now is certainly not the time to start pointing fingers and trying to get back at your partner for whatever they have done.

All you can do right now, as hard as it can be, is give your partner time to come to terms with your own apology and see for themselves the changes in your behaviour. Forgiveness will come with time. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

5. Follow your apology up with positive actions

Saying sorry is important, but it is not enough on its own to heal your spouse’s harm and move forward. It is the ACTIONS that follow which actually do most of the relationship repairing.

Apologies have to be backed up with favorable changes in behaviour, as otherwise your spouse will eliminate faith in you and will end up more hurt and betrayed consequently.

If you’ve betrayed your partner in some manner, the secret is to be utterly transparent with your partner in future — don’t attempt to hide or cover up anything.

Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about everything — where you are, what you are doing, that you are with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.

This may appear over-the-top, but the simple truth is that your partner is likely to be feeling really vulnerable at the moment, and their trust in you has been ruined. So in order to their hope to be regained, you need to leave literally zero doubts in their own mind.

And remember, one huge gesture of chocolates and flowers once you have messed up is nice, but it’s not going to have the same impact as constant small actions to improve your behavior and reveal your partner how much you value them.

Even if your spouse doesn’t accept your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you are through loving actions, you’ve got the hope of regaining their love and trust. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

Cheatproof-your-relationship

Sharing is caring!

How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say for your partner — I’m sure you agree!

By saying so, you’re admitting that you have messed up and have hurt among the people you love the most. It is never simple.

However, the thing is, we’re all human and most of us make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes that actually hurt our partners.

When this occurs, it is our job to take responsibility and apologize, EVEN whenever your mistake is so BIG you feel like there’s nearly “too much” to apologize for.

It’s true that the deeper the hurt, the longer the recovery process will take.

Continue below to learn what these steps are, and feel free to share experiences and your own thoughts at the end. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Truly Mean It. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

1. Forgive yourself

You could be thinking something like: “How in the world can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How can an apology begin with ME?

But there are numerous reasons why it is necessary to attempt to make peace with yourself after you have made a mistake.

To start with, dwelling on remorseful and self-loathing thoughts will use all of your emotional energy up.

This is NOT going to be useful for your marriage or you, as it keeps the focus on the PROBLEM, rather than what you can do to FIX it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you’ll have the ability to focus your energy on what you could do to compensate for it.

Let me be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you’re not clearing yourself of any blame… You openly admit that you’ve made a mistake.

But you’re also acknowledging that the behaviour you have done wrong does not mean you are a terrible person as a whole and you’ve got the chance to be your very best self from now on…

 

 

2. Apologize to your partner and take full responsibility

When it comes to saying sorry, the sooner the better. But, an apology has to be said with feeling and genuine sincerity to work.

So you need time until you confer with your partner, take this time to calm down. An sarcastic or angry apology is only going to make the situation even more worse.

As difficult as it is, look into your partner’s eyes once you go to apologize to them.

For example; “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you were looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late”.

Lastly, never never NEVER say “I am sorry” and follow this up with a “but” or an excuse.

For example: “I’m so sorry I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to heading out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I arrived home. However, the reason I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I am busy with work and find it difficult to keep track of what is going on sometimes”.

This will make your apology meaningless, and even imply that you are BLAMING your partner — which is just going to push them further away.

So take full responsibility for the actions… don’t attempt to downplay your mistake to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it will not work!) And focus only on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

3. Make promises for the future

Come up with a plan to make certain your mistake won’t be repeated in the future and communicate this to your partner. Just make sure any promises you make can be followed upon.

For example:

“I have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my telephone, Facebook, Twitter, and will inform you immediately if he/she ever tries to get in contact with me.

I’m pleased to give you open access to all my account and my telephone if this would be helpful to you|If this would be helpful to you, I’m pleased to offer you open access to every one of my accounts and my phone. I promise to keep in communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.

I truly wish to make this work and will do anything is needed. I will clear my schedule out of work so that I could spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you’re comfortable with at this time.” How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

4. Accept your spouse’s reaction

A common assumption that a spouse frequently makes is that when they have apologized, wife or their husband should stop being sad or mad and give them forgiveness.

And when this does not happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I’ve just apologized! What more to you need me to do?! Why can’t you just accept it and move on?!”

The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can’t FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own choice.

Therefore don’t expect anything from your partner at the moment.

It’s true, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it might feel excruciating being fulfilled by the silence or angry words of your spouse. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.

Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, even though this might be your initial instinct — as it will undo the good you have just accomplished by apologizing.

And now is definitely not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back at your spouse for anything they’ve done.

All you can do now, as hard as it will be, is give your partner time to come to terms with your own apology and also see for themselves that the adjustments in your own behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

 

5. Follow your apology up with positive actions

Saying sorry is important, but it is not enough on its own to cure your partner’s harm and move forward. It’s the ACTIONS that follow that really do the majority of the relationship repairing.

Apologies need to be backed up with positive changes in behavior, as otherwise your spouse will eliminate faith in you and also will end up more hurt and betrayed as a result.

If you’ve betrayed your partner in some manner, the biggest secret is to be utterly transparent with your partner in future — do not try to hide or cover up anything.

Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about everything — where you are, what you are doing, that you are with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.

This might seem counter-intuitive, however, the simple truth is that your partner is very likely to be feeling very vulnerable at the moment, and their hope in you has been shattered. So in order for their trust to be recovered, you have to leave literally zero doubts in their own mind.

And remember, one huge gesture of flowers and chocolates once you’ve messed up is nice, but it’s not likely to have the identical effect as continuous small actions to improve your behaviour and reveal your spouse how much you value them.

Even if your spouse doesn’t accept your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you’re through loving actions, you have the hope of regaining their love and trust. How To Get My Ex Husband Back When He Has A Girlfriend

Cheatproof-your-relationship

Sharing is caring!

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