In the middle of a workshop recently a important question was asked concerning what generates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week that in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and also to think of exactly what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

A number of men in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items like their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these things felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these individuals or items was rewarding and simple to maintain.

A range of girls considered kitchen appliances, favorite shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with items they used in their lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and comforting were used.

When my turn arrived to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has simple needs, requiring just food, shelter, and love. No matter how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it is quite humbling once you consider it. How To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

I have no idea of any others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from no matter how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

 

Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?How To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It’s the kind of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your partner has flaws. You know your partner is not perfect. You know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that is okay, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your partner because of the imperfections rather than in spite of them.

This is unconditional love.How To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that’s okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.

What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let’s problems become bigger than they really are and rule our lives.

If you are serious about saving your marriage the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is okay to possess flaws and make errors. It is okay to have feelings and thoughts. But over all of this is the love you’ve got for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It’s possible to not enjoy your spouse or not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.

It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Fix Your Marriage After Infidelity

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