In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked concerning what generates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week that in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and also to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

A number of men in the group thought of the cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these guys, these items felt easy, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and simple to keep.

A number of girls believed kitchen appliances, favored shoes or clothes, older friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had generated either between people or with items they utilized in their lives. Words like trustworthy reliable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has simple needs, requiring shelter, only food, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what sort of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it is very humbling when you think about it. How To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

I have no idea of any others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of no matter how my day has been or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

 

So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without requirements. It is the type of love that you have for the partner when the romantic, love that is hollywood-style is now gone. Once the amorous love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your spouse has flaws. You understand your spouse is not perfect. You understand your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay, although you understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your spouse because of the imperfections as opposed to despite of them.

That is unconditional love.How To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

The same thing applies for you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You admit that you are exactly the same. You’ve got faults. You are not perfect. You know that you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections which people have.

So what can you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let’s issues become bigger than they really are and dominate our own lives.

If you’re serious about saving your marriage that the secret is in finding ways to put the emotional clutter to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to possess flaws and make errors. It’s okay to have feelings and thoughts. But above all of this is your love you have for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It’s possible to not like your spouse or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.

It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Fix My Marriage Without Counseling

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