In the middle of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked concerning what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with some thing in the last week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

A number of men in the group thought of the cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items such as their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these men, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these individuals or items was rewarding and easy to maintain.

A range of girls believed kitchen appliances, preferred shoes or clothes, older friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with items they used in their own lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has quite simple needs, requiring shelter, food, and love. No matter how my day has been or what sort of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is quite humbling once you think about it. How To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

I don’t know of any others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from regardless of how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

 

So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without conditions. It is the kind of love that you have for your partner when the amorous, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the amorous love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You understand by now your partner has flaws. You understand your spouse isn’t perfect. You know your spouse makes mistakes but that’s okay, although you realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse because of the imperfections instead of despite of those.

This is unconditional love.How To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

The identical thing applies for you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You admit that you’re the exact same. You have flaws. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections which people have.

So what do you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let our issues become larger than they actually are and dominate our lives.

If you’re serious about saving your marriage that the secret is in finding methods to put the emotional clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make errors. It’s fine to have feelings and thoughts. But above all of this is your love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer all of them.

It is possible to not like your partner or maybe not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for the spouse and your marriage can remain constant.

It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

 

Final ThoughtsHow To Fix My Marriage After Cheating

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