In the center of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked about what generates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week that in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Fix Marriage Without Counseling
A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items such as their television recliner chair, or favourite pair of shoes. To each of these guys, these things felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.
A number of women considered kitchen appliances, favorite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had generated either between individuals or with items they utilized in their own lives. Words like dependable reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has quite simple needs, requiring shelter, only food, and love. No matter how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is very humbling when you consider it. How To Fix Marriage Without Counseling
I don’t know of any others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of no matter how my day has been or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Fix Marriage Without Counseling
So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Fix Marriage Without Counseling
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without requirements. It is the type of love that you have for the partner once the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand chances are your spouse has flaws. You know your spouse is not perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes but that is fine, although you know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your partner because of the imperfections instead of in spite of those.
This is unconditional love.How To Fix Marriage Without Counseling
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You admit that you are exactly the same. You’ve got flaws. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections that people have.
So what can you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us mess our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there’s the desire to let’s issues become larger than they really are and rule our own lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage the key is in finding methods to place the emotional clutter to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s fine to have faults and make errors. It is fine to have thoughts and feelings. But above all of this is the love you have for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It is possible to not enjoy your spouse or maybe not like what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for the spouse and your marriage can remain constant.
It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Fix Marriage Without Counseling
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