In the middle of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week which in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of shoes. To every one of these guys, these things felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such people or objects was rewarding and simple to keep.
A number of girls considered kitchen appliances, favored shoes or clothes, older friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with items they used in their lives. Words like reliable, dependable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn came to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple demands, requiring food, shelter, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s quite humbling when you think about it. How To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
I don’t know of some others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of regardless of how my day has been or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without requirements. It’s the kind of love that you have for your partner once the romantic, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand by now your spouse has faults. You realize your spouse isn’t perfect. You know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you understand your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your partner due to the imperfections rather than despite of those.
This really is unconditional love.How To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are exactly the same. You’ve got flaws. You are not perfect. You know that you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections which people have.
What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let’s problems become larger than they actually are and dominate our lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage that the key is in finding ways to place the emotional clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to possess flaws and make errors. It’s fine to have thoughts and feelings. But over all this is your love you’ve got for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It’s possible to not like your spouse or not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for the spouse and your marriage can remain constant.
It is the right time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
Final ThoughtsHow To Fix A Completely Broken Marriage
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