In the middle of a workshop lately a important question was asked concerning what generates the ideal relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. How To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
A number of guys in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with such people or objects was rewarding and easy to keep.
A number of girls believed kitchen appliances, preferred shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had created either between individuals or with items they used in their own lives. Words like reliable, trustworthy, and comforting were used.
When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple demands, requiring shelter, meals, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s very humbling once you consider it. How To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
I don’t know of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from the house or regardless of how my day has been. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
So What Is Unconditional Love?How To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without conditions. It’s the type of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize by now your spouse has faults. You know your partner is not perfect. You know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay, although you realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your spouse because of the imperfections as opposed to in spite of them.
This really is unconditional love.How To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you’re exactly the exact same. You’ve got faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine. That’s called self-acceptance, and you hope unconditional love to conquer the faults and imperfections which people have.
What exactly do you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues become larger than they actually are and rule our lives.
If you are serious about saving your marriage that the secret is in finding ways to place the psychological mess to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to possess flaws and make mistakes. It is fine to have thoughts and feelings. But above all of this is the love you have for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer all of them.
It is possible to not enjoy your partner or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you have for the spouse and your marriage can stay constant.
It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
Final ThoughtsHow To Fix A Broken Marriage Without Trust
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