In the center of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week which in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and also to think of what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How Do You Save A Failing Marriage

A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To every one of these guys, these things felt easy, and comfortable. The relationships they had with these individuals or objects was rewarding and easy to keep.

A number of girls believed kitchen appliances, favourite shoes or clothes, old friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had generated either between individuals or with things they utilized in their own lives. Words like dependable reliable, and reassuring were used.

When my turn came to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has quite simple demands, requiring meals, shelter, and love. No matter how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I’m greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, also it is very humbling once you think about it. How Do You Save A Failing Marriage

I don’t know of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of no matter how my day has been or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How Do You Save A Failing Marriage

 

So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How Do You Save A Failing Marriage

What is unconditional love

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner once the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.

You realize by now your partner has faults. You know your spouse is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes but that’s fine, although you know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your spouse because of the imperfections instead of despite of them.

That is unconditional love.How Do You Save A Failing Marriage

The same thing applies for you however in taking a look at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the exact same. You’ve got flaws. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.

What exactly do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let our problems become larger than they actually are and dominate our lives.

If you’re serious about saving your marriage that the secret is in finding methods to place the psychological mess to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make errors. It’s okay to have thoughts and feelings. But above all of this is the love you have for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer them all.

It is possible to not enjoy your spouse or maybe not like what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.

It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How Do You Save A Failing Marriage

 

Final ThoughtsHow Do You Save A Failing Marriage

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