How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say to your spouse — I’m certain you agree!
By saying so, you’re admitting that you’ve messed up and have hurt one of the people that you love the most. It’s never easy.
But the thing is, we’re all human and we ALL make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes that really hurt our spouses.
When this occurs, it is our job to take responsibility and apologize, EVEN whenever your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there’s almost “too much” to apologize for.
It is a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will take.
Continue below to find out what these steps are, and don’t hesitate to talk about your own thoughts and experiences in the conclusion. How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me
5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Truly Mean It. How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me
1. Forgive yourself
You could be thinking something like: “How on earth can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How do an apology begin with ME?”
But there are several reasons why it’s imperative to try to make peace with yourself after you have made a mistake.
First of all, dwelling on thoughts that are remorseful and self-loathing is going to use up all of your emotional energy.
This is NOT going to be helpful for you or your marriage, since it keeps the focus on the issue, rather than what you can do to repair it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you’ll be able to then focus your energy on what you can do to compensate for it.
Allow me to be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you’re not clearing yourself of any blame… You freely admit that you have made a mistake.
However, you are also acknowledging that the behavior you have done wrong does not mean you are a bad person as a whole and you’ve got the chance to be your best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your partner and accept full responsibility
In regards to saying sorry, the sooner the better. But, an apology needs to be said with feeling and real sincerity to be effective.
So you will need time before you confer with your spouse, take this moment to calm down. An angry or sarcastic apology will only make the situation even more worse.
As hard as it can, look into your spouse’s eyes once you go to confer with them.
For instance; “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late”.
Last, never never NEVER say “I’m sorry” and follow it up with a “but” or an excuse.
For instance: “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you were looking forward to going out and how frustrated and hurt you have to’ve felt when I arrived home late. However, the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I’m busy with work and find it hard to keep track of what is going on occasionally”.
This will make your apology meaningless, and also imply that you’re BLAMING your partner — which is just going to push them farther away.
So accept full responsibility for the actions… Do not attempt to downplay your mistake to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it won’t work!) And concentrate just on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a plan to make certain your mistake will not be repeated in the future and communicate this to your partner. Make sure any promises you make could be followed upon.
“I will have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my phone, Facebook, Twitter, and will let you know instantly if he/she tries to get in contact with me.
I’m happy to give you open access to all my accounts and my telephone if that would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I am pleased to give you access. I promise to keep in regular communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I really wish to make this work and will do whatever is needed. I will clear my schedule outside of work so that I could spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you are comfortable with right now.” How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A frequent premise that a partner often makes is that as soon as they’ve apologized, wife or their husband should stop being angry or sad and give them forgiveness.
And when this does not happen, the apologizing spouse explodes and says something along the lines of: “I have just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or wife for their forgiveness, but you can’t FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their decision.
So don’t expect anything from your spouse right now.
Yes, you’re making yourself vulnerable and yes, it might feel excruciating being met by your spouse’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.
So avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, even though this may be your first instinct — as it will only reverse the good you have accomplished by apologizing.
And now is certainly not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back in your partner for anything they have done.
All you can do right now, as hard as it is, is give your partner time to come to terms with your own apology and see for themselves the adjustments on your behaviour. Forgiveness will come with time. How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is important, but it is not sufficient on its own to cure your spouse’s harm and move. It is the ACTIONS that follow that actually do most of the relationship repairing.
Apologies have to get backed up with favorable changes in behaviour, as otherwise your spouse will eliminate faith in you and will end up more hurt and betrayed as a result.
If you have betrayed your spouse in some way, the key is to be utterly transparent with your spouse in future — do not try to hide or cover anything up.
Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about what — where you are, what you are doing, who you are with, what you’re spending… EVERYTHING.
This might appear counter-intuitive, however, the truth is that your spouse is likely to be feeling very vulnerable right now, and their hope in you has been shattered. So in order to their hope to be regained, you need to leave literally no doubts in their own mind.
And remember, one huge gesture of chocolates and flowers after you’ve messed up is fine, but it’s not going to get the identical effect as continuous small steps to improve your behaviour and show your spouse how much you appreciate them.
Even if your partner does not take your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you are through loving actions, you have the best hope of regaining their love and trust. How Do I Make My Ex Husband Fall Back In Love With Me