In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week that in one’s head was the perfect relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
A number of men in the group thought of the cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To every one of these men, these items felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with such individuals or objects was rewarding and easy to keep.
A number of women believed kitchen appliances, favored clothes or shoes, old friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond that they had created either between people or with things they utilized in their lives. Words such as reliable reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my dog. My dog has rather simple demands, requiring shelter, food, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it’s very humbling once you think about it. How Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
I don’t know of any others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of the house or no matter how my day has been. His needs are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.How Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It’s the type of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand chances are your spouse has flaws. You understand your spouse is not perfect. You realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine, although you understand your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your partner due to the imperfections as opposed to in spite of those.
That is unconditional love.How Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
The same thing applies for you however in taking a look at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you are the exact same. You’ve got flaws. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that’s okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections that people have.
What exactly do you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our difficulties become bigger than they really are and dominate our lives.
If you are seriously interested in saving your marriage the secret is in finding ways to put the emotional clutter to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It’s fine to possess flaws and make mistakes. It is fine to have thoughts and feelings. But above all of this is your love you’ve got for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It’s possible to not enjoy your spouse or maybe not like what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for the spouse and your marriage can stay constant.
It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
Final ThoughtsHow Do I Know If I Should Save My Marriage
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