In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked concerning what generates the perfect relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. How Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
A number of guys in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items such as their television recliner chair, or favourite pair of shoes. To every one of these guys, these items felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these people or items was rewarding and simple to keep.
A number of women considered kitchen appliances, favourite clothes or shoes, older friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had generated either between people or with items they used in their lives. Words like reliable reliable, and comforting were used.
When my turn came to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has quite simple needs, requiring food, shelter, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it’s quite humbling once you think about it. How Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
I don’t know of some others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?How Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without requirements. It is the kind of love that you have for your partner once the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You know by now your partner has faults. You realize your partner is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your partner due to those imperfections instead of in spite of those.
This is unconditional love.How Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
The same thing applies to you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You admit that you are the exact same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that is okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections which people have.
So what can you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all mess our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our difficulties become larger than they actually are and dominate our own lives.
If you are serious about saving your marriage that the secret is in finding ways to put the psychological mess to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to possess flaws and make errors. It is okay to have feelings and thoughts. But over all of this is the love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you have for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It’s possible to not enjoy your partner or not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.
It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and figure out how to love unconditionally.How Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
Final ThoughtsHow Can I Save My Marriage When My Wife Wants Out
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