In the center of a workshop recently a important question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of exactly what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. How Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
A number of guys in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with items such as their television recliner chair, or favourite pair of shoes. To every one of these men, these things felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such people or items was rewarding and simple to keep.
A number of women believed kitchen appliances, preferred shoes or clothes, older friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond which they had generated either between individuals or with items they utilized in their lives. Words like dependable reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn came to identify my perfect relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has quite simple demands, requiring shelter, only food, and love. No matter how my day was or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home at night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, also it is quite humbling when you consider it. How Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
I have no idea of some others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of regardless of how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.How Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
So What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?How Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without requirements. It’s the kind of love that you have for the partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize chances are your spouse has faults. You understand your spouse is not perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes but that is okay, although you realize your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You like your spouse due to the imperfections as opposed to despite of them.
This is unconditional love.How Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
The same thing applies to you however in taking a look at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You have flaws. You are not perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections which people have.
So what can you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there’s the desire to let’s issues become bigger than they really are and rule our own lives.
If you are serious about saving your marriage the secret is in finding ways to place the psychological mess to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make errors. It’s okay to have thoughts and feelings. But above all of this is your love you’ve got for your partner, the love you have for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It is possible to not like your spouse or perhaps not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your own life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage can stay constant.
It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.How Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
Final ThoughtsHow Can A Marriage Be Saved From Total Collapse
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