Get My Husband Back From His Mistress
Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say for your spouse — I am sure you agree!
By saying so, you are admitting that you have messed up and have hurt one of those people you love the most. It’s never simple.
But the thing is, we are all human and we ALL make mistakes. And unfortunately, sometimes we make mistakes which actually hurt our spouses.
When this occurs, it is our job apologize and to take responsibility, EVEN when your mistake is so BIG you feel like there is almost “too much” to apologize for.
It’s a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will require.
Continue below to learn what these steps are, and feel free to talk about experiences and your own thoughts at the end. Get My Husband Back From His Mistress
5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Truly Mean It. Get My Husband Back From His Mistress
1. Forgive yourself
You could be thinking something like: “How on earth could I ever forgive myself?” Or “How can an apology start with ME?”
But there are several reasons why it is imperative to try to make peace with yourself after you have made a mistake.
First of all, dwelling on thoughts that are remorseful and self-loathing is going to use up all of your emotional energy.
This is NOT going to be useful for you or your marriage, as it keeps the focus on the issue, rather than what you can do to repair it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you will have the ability to focus your energy on what you can do in order to make up for it.
Allow me to be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you’re not clearing yourself of any blame… You freely admit that you have made a mistake.
However, you’re also acknowledging that the behaviour you have done wrong does not mean you are a bad person as a whole and you’ve got the opportunity to be your best self from now on…
2. Apologize to your spouse and take full responsibility
When it comes to saying sorry, the earlier the better. But, an apology has to be said with real sincerity and feeling to work.
So you will need the time before you apologize to your spouse, take this time to calm down. An angry or sarcastic apology will only make the situation even more worse.
As hard as it is, look at your partner’s eyes once you go to apologize to them.
For instance; “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late”.
Lastly, never never NEVER say “I’m sorry” and follow this up with a “but” or an excuse.
For instance: “I am so sorry I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you were looking forward to heading out and how disappointed and hurt you have to’ve felt when I came home late. BUT the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I’m busy with work and find it hard to keep track of what’s happening sometimes”.
This will make your apology meaningless, and even imply that you are BLAMING your partner — which is only going to push them further away.
So accept full responsibility for your actions… Do not try to downplay your mistake to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it will not work!) And concentrate only on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. Get My Husband Back From His Mistress
3. Make promises for the future
Come up with a strategy to ensure your mistake will not be repeated in the future and communicate this to your partner. Make sure any promises you make can be followed upon.
“I will have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my telephone, Facebook, Twitter, and will inform you instantly if he/she ever tries to get in contact with me.
I am pleased to give you access to all my account and my telephone if that would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I’m pleased to give you access to every one my accounts and my telephone. I promise to keep in regular communication with you and from now on I will always be at home when I say I will.
I truly want to make this work and will do anything it takes. I can clear my schedule outside of work so I can spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you’re comfortable with right now.” Get My Husband Back From His Mistress
4. Accept your spouse’s reaction
A frequent premise that a spouse often makes is that as soon as they’ve apologized, their husband or wife should stop being sad or mad and give forgiveness to them.
And if this does not happen, the apologizing spouse explodes and says something along the lines of: “I have just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”
The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can not FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their decision.
So don’t expect anything from your partner at the moment.
It’s true, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it may feel excruciating being met by your spouse’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I am sorry”.
So avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, even though this might be your first instinct — since it is only going to undo the good you have just done by apologizing.
And now is certainly not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back in your partner for whatever they have done.
All you can do right now, as hard as it can be, is give your spouse time to come to terms with your own apology and see for themselves the adjustments in your own behavior. Forgiveness will come with time. Get My Husband Back From His Mistress
5. Follow your apology up with positive actions
Saying sorry is important, but it is not enough on its own to cure your spouse’s hurt and move forward. It is the ACTIONS that follow which really do most of the relationship repairing.
Apologies have to be backed up with favorable changes in behavior, as otherwise your partner will lose faith in you and also will become more hurt and betrayed as a result.
If you’ve betrayed your partner in some way, the key is to be utterly transparent with your partner in future — do not try to hide or cover anything up.
Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about everything — where you are, what you are doing, that you’re with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.
This might appear counter-intuitive, however, the simple truth is that your partner is likely to be feeling very vulnerable right now, and their hope in you has been ruined. So in order for their trust to be recovered, you need to leave literally no doubts in their own mind.
And keep in mind, one big gesture of chocolates and flowers after you’ve messed up is fine, but it’s not going to get the identical effect as constant small actions to improve your behavior and show your partner how much you value them.
Even if your partner doesn’t accept your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to demonstrate how sorry you are through loving actions, you have the best hope of regaining their trust and love. Get My Husband Back From His Mistress