In the middle of a workshop recently a important question was asked concerning what generates the perfect relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week that in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and also to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. Fixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
A number of men in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with these individuals or objects was rewarding and simple to keep.
A range of girls believed kitchen appliances, favourite clothes or shoes, older friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond which they had generated either between individuals or with items they utilized in their lives. Words such as reassuring, reliable, and reliable were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple needs, requiring shelter, only meals, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I’m greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is quite humbling when you think about it. Fixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
I have no idea of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from regardless of how my day has been or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.Fixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?Fixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without conditions. It’s the kind of love that you have for your partner once the romantic, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You know by now your partner has flaws. You understand your spouse is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine, although you understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your spouse due to the imperfections as opposed to in spite of them.
That is unconditional love.Fixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
The identical thing applies to you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are exactly the same. You have flaws. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that’s okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.
What exactly can you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all mess our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let’s problems become bigger than they actually are and dominate our own lives.
If you are serious about saving your marriage the secret is in finding methods to put the emotional clutter to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It is fine to possess flaws and make errors. It is fine to have feelings and thoughts. But above all this is the love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It is possible to not enjoy your spouse or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.
It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Fixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
Final ThoughtsFixing Your Marriage Without Counseling
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