When confronting a marriage crisis, this is one of the questions spouses ask: Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse 

How can I save my marriage if my partner does not wish to help find an answer…?

How do I succeed I’m trying to save my marriage on my own…?

It’s a standard enough story: one partner leaves, the other remains. One remains “in love”, the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that’s caused a couple to become apart, the one person who remains bears the potential, uncertainty, fear, desire, hope of rescuing his or her marriage’ ALONE.

Considering there are two different people contributing to the overall health and well being of a marriage, shouldn’t both of you be present to actually try and save it? Or, worse, when it’s his, or her, their fault shouldn’t he, she, they’re the ones to make amends? You are just the victim here, after all!

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Photo by Trym Nilsen on Unsplash

 

How To Save Your Relationship On Your Own Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

The very first thing you need to know is, if you find yourself alone in this desire and if you want to save your marriage, waiting for the other partner to make the initial move would be the beginning of the ending.

Again, it’s likely to fail if you are looking for a person to blame or somebody else to set the physical and psychological work in to saving the marriage. Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

The belief that the responsibility lies with the other individual is a self-defeating attitude. It propagates the impression that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you should stand and see what comes your way.

NOT correct!

There’s still something you are able to DO. Even in solitude and your loneliness, you CAN save your marriage.

How…?

Let’s start first by examining what it means to be all on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. It’s part of our genetic make up to be social creatures and create connections with other people, whether through friendships or romantic interest. The way we connect with others of the way we interact with individuals, and the nature is a fundamental part of development that is personal and psychological. Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

The paradox is that as we grow older in trust, the love, companionship and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us whole, happy human beings. Ideally, the older human person should have developed a strong sense of confidence, self-awareness and self-esteem as he or she reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we see the world, flaws, and all. These constitute part of our private shelter amidst difficulties and challenges. This is called SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, many of us enter into adult life without being conscious of this beautiful, human truth. We could have experienced abandonment in our childhood or been disappointed by our intimate relationships.

whatever it is, it’s caused to shift from appropriate adult development to fears of abandonment and the inability to find that we can stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many people enter marriages and relationships with plan, the hope and dream that we’d never be alone. We {invest so much in our spouses and loved ones, focusing our whole beings on them and rely upon them to make us secure and happy. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own toxin.

Subconsciously, we project the duty of our life pleasure on the other person, eloquently sidestepping taking responsibility for our life happiness and destiny.

Problems develop when a partner indicates some kind of dissatisfaction with the relationship or the expectations unwittingly placed upon them, and if they do so we fear. When our partner leaves, our fears kick in. When something goes wrong with our marriages, it’s extremely easy for us to place the blame of the person for having made us unhappy.Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

In order to save your marriage when you’re the only one doing it, the key is a paradigm shift, meaning, the important thing is to change your attitude and focus. Stop focusing on your partner – stop the blaming, stop the inaction.

Take a good look at yourself and what you can do in this moment. You can NOT restrain your partner’s feelings, attitude and reactions, but you can control your own. You can go from fearing abandonment to actually taking responsibility for yourself and your own happiness.

This is where the individual truth about self-actualization comes in. Know, internalize and adapt this on your own. Learn it. It will spell the difference not only in your marriage but in YOU.

An entire human being is easy to love. A happy person brings joy. In starting with yourself, you can move from being an clingy, hard person to a person who can provide an environment of safety, wisdom, trust and open communication.

If each of you have the ability to self-sustain when it comes to taking responsibility for your own lifetime happiness, you both have much less baggage and much more real love to bring in the relationship. Your motivation shifts from being one of fear to being one of authentic love.

Instead of beat up yourself in Despair, try these tips to start your own personal transformation and lead your marriage to success:Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

  • Breathe…
  • Smile…
  • Let go…
  • Believe that reconnection is possible…
  • See a counselor for YOURSELF not only for your marriage
  • Examine your part in contributing to the difficulties in your marriage
  • Forgive yourself…
  • Change…
  • Look after your health, beauty, and well-being…

For all you know, your spouse (and you) may just rediscover the person that they first fell in love with and more. For this is the kind of you that would allow your partner initiate communication and to come back. When that occurs, you have every chance to sit down with him or her, talk about your motivations, feelings and plans. You can even get to the issues surrounding your marital issues and actually begin taking positive steps to work them through. Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

In being open and older, you can provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once more. With all the confidence and sincerity you’ve gathered, take these steps. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or difficulties, find it to keep showing him or her that you do and loving your partner. Can My Marriage Be Saved After Abuse

Through small, subtle acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t need to be gestures, they simply have to be sincere. And coming out of the mature, new you.

You might be making!

You can not afford to give your marriage 50 percent…

You want 100% – you will need the very best, PROVEN information and METHODS now!

You need to learn what is necessary to save your marriage.

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