In the middle of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked concerning what creates the ideal relationship. We had been asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the previous week that in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. Can Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
A number of men in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects such as their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To every one of these men, these items felt simple, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such individuals or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.
A range of girls believed kitchen appliances, favourite shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had created either between individuals or with things they utilized in their own lives. Words such as reliable, reliable, and comforting were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has quite simple demands, requiring shelter, food, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it’s quite humbling when you consider it. Can Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
I have no idea of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of regardless of how my day was or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.Can Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?Can Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand by now your spouse has flaws. You know your spouse is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your spouse due to those imperfections as opposed to in spite of those.
This is unconditional love.Can Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You’ve got flaws. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections which people have.
What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with thoughts and emotions, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let our issues become bigger than they actually are and rule our lives.
If you’re serious about saving your marriage the secret is in finding ways to put the emotional clutter to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to have faults and make mistakes. It’s fine to have feelings and thoughts. But over all this is the love you’ve got for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer them all.
It’s possible to not like your partner or not like what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like wherever your life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.
It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Can Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
Final ThoughtsCan Marriage Be Saved After Abuse
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