Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say to your partner — I am sure you all agree!

By saying this, you are admitting that you’ve messed up and have hurt one of the people you love the most. It’s never simple.

However, the thing is, we’re all human and we ALL make mistakes. And regrettably, sometimes we make mistakes which actually hurt our partners.

When this occurs, it is our job apologize and to take responsibility, EVEN when your mistake is so BIG you feel like there is nearly “too much” to apologize for.

It is a fact that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will take.

Continue below to learn what these steps are, and feel free to talk about experiences and your own thoughts in the conclusion. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

5 Step to Say “I’m Sorry” and Really Mean It. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

1. Forgive yourself

You might be thinking something like: “How in the world can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How do an apology start with ME?

But there are numerous reasons why it’s imperative to try to make peace with yourself after you’ve made a mistake.

To start with, dwelling on thoughts that are self-loathing and remorseful is going to use up all of your emotional energy.

This isn’t going to be helpful for your marriage or you, as it keeps the focus on the PROBLEM, rather than what you can do to repair it. If you can accept the mistake you have made, you will have the ability to focus your energy on what you can do in order to make up for it.

Let me be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you are not clearing yourself of any blame… You openly admit that you have made a mistake.

But you are also acknowledging that the behavior you have done wrong does not mean you’re a terrible person as a whole and you’ve got the opportunity to be your very best self from now on…

 

 

2. Apologize to your spouse and take full responsibility

When it comes to stating sorry, the sooner the better. But, an apology needs to be said with real sincerity and feeling to work.

So you will need the time to calm down before you confer with your partner, take this time. An sarcastic or angry apology will make the situation even more worse.

As difficult as it is, look into your spouse’s eyes when you go to apologize to them.

For instance; “I am so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late”.

Last, never never NEVER say “I am sorry” and follow this up with a “but” or an excuse.

For instance: “I am so sorry I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you had been looking forward to heading out and how frustrated and hurt you must’ve felt when I came home late. However, the reason I forgot about dinner is because YOU didn’t remind me this afternoon. You know I’m busy with work and find it hard to keep track of what’s happening occasionally”.

This will make your apology meaningless, and also indicate that you are BLAMING your spouse — which is only going to push them further away.

So accept full responsibility for the actions… Do not attempt to reevaluate your error to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it will not work!) And focus just on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

3. Make promises for the future

Come up with a strategy to make certain your mistake won’t be repeated in the future and communicate this to your spouse. Make sure any promises you make could be followed up on.

For example:

“I have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her out of my phone, Facebook, Twitter, and also will inform you immediately if he/she tries to get in touch with me.

I am happy to give you access to all my account and my telephone if this would be helpful to you|If that would be helpful to you, I am happy to give you open access. I promise to keep in regular communication with you about what I am doing and from today on I will always be at home when I say I will.

I really want to make this work and will do anything is needed. I can clear my schedule out of work so that I can spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you are comfortable with at this time.” Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

4. Accept your spouse’s reaction

A frequent premise that a spouse often makes is that as soon as they have apologized, their husband or wife should stop being sad or angry and give them forgiveness.

And if this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse stinks and says something along the lines of: “I have just apologized! What more to you want me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”

The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can’t FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own choice.

Therefore don’t expect anything from your spouse right now.

It’s true, you are making yourself vulnerable and yes, it may feel excruciating being fulfilled angry words or by your partner’s silence. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I am sorry”.

So avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, despite the fact that this might be your first instinct — as it is only going to undo the good you have accomplished by apologizing.

And now is definitely not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back in your partner for whatever they have done.

All you can do right now, as hard as it will be, is give your spouse time to come to terms with your apology and see for themselves that the changes on your behaviour. Forgiveness will come with time. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

5. Follow your apology up with positive actions

Saying sorry is important, but it is not sufficient on its own to heal your partner’s harm and move. It’s the ACTIONS that follow which really do most of the relationship repairing.

Apologies need to be backed up with positive changes in behaviour, as otherwise your spouse will eliminate faith in you and will become more hurt and betrayed as a result.

If you have betrayed your spouse in some manner, the biggest secret is to be utterly transparent with your spouse in future — don’t try to hide or cover anything up.

Keep the lines of communication open and be fair about everything — where you are, what you are doing, who you are with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.

This might appear counter-intuitive, however, the truth is that your spouse is very likely to be feeling very vulnerable right now, and their trust in you has been ruined. So in order to their hope to be regained, you need to leave literally zero doubts in their mind.

And remember, one huge gesture of chocolates and flowers once you have messed up is nice, but it is not likely to have the same effect as constant small steps to improve your behaviour and reveal your spouse how much you value them.

Even if your partner does not take your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to show how sorry you’re through loving actions, you have the hope of regaining their love and trust. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

Cheatproof-your-relationship

Sharing is caring!

Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

Sorry can be the HARDEST thing to say to your spouse — I’m sure you agree!

By saying this, you’re admitting that you’ve messed up and have hurt among those people you love the most. It’s never simple.

But the thing is, we are all human and we ALL make mistakes. And regrettably, sometimes we make mistakes that actually hurt our partners.

When this happens, it is our job apologize and to take responsibility, EVEN whenever your mistake is so BIG you really feel like there is nearly “too much” to apologize for.

It’s true that the deeper the hurt, the longer the healing process will take.

Continue below to find out what these steps are, and feel free to share experiences and your own thoughts in the end. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

5 Step to Say “I Am Sorry” and Really Mean It. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

1. Forgive yourself

You could be thinking something like: “How in the world can I ever forgive myself?” Or “How do an apology start with ME?

However there are several reasons why it’s imperative to try to make peace with yourself after you’ve made a mistake.

First of all, dwelling on thoughts that are self-loathing and remorseful is going to use all of your emotional energy up.

This isn’t going to be helpful for you or your marriage, as it keeps the focus on the PROBLEM, rather than what you can do to repair it. If you can accept the mistake you’ve made, you will be able to focus your energy on what you can do to make up for it.

Allow me to be clear here. By forgiving yourself, you are not clearing yourself of any blame… You openly admit that you have made a mistake.

But you are also acknowledging that the behaviour you’ve done wrong does not mean you are a terrible person as a whole and you have the chance to be your very best self from now on…

 

 

2. Apologize to your spouse and take full responsibility

In regards to saying sorry, the earlier the better. However, an apology has to be said with feeling and real sincerity to be effective.

So you will need time to calm down before you apologize to your partner, take this moment. An angry or sarcastic apology will make the situation even more worse.

As difficult as it is, look into your spouse’s eyes when you go to apologize to them.

For instance; “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I know how much you had been looking forward to going out and how disappointed and hurt you have felt when I came home late”.

Lastly, never never NEVER say “I am sorry” and follow this up with a “but” or an excuse.

For example: “I’m so sorry that I forgot we had plans for dinner tonight. I understand how much you were looking forward to heading out and how frustrated and hurt you have to’ve felt when I arrived home. However, the reason why I forgot about dinner is because YOU did not remind me this morning. You know I am busy with work and find it difficult to keep track of what’s going on occasionally”.

This will make your apology meaningless, and even imply that you’re BLAMING your spouse — that is just going to push them farther away.

So take full responsibility for the actions… don’t attempt to reevaluate your error to make yourself feel better (because believe me, it won’t work!) And concentrate only on YOUR actions, not your spouse’s. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

3. Make promises for the future

Come up with a plan to ensure your mistake won’t be repeated in the future and communicate this to your spouse. Make sure any promises you make can be followed up on.

For example:

“I will have absolutely no further contact with that person. I will delete him/her from my phone, Facebook, Twitter, and will let you know instantly if he/she tries to get in touch with me.

I’m pleased to give you open access to all of my accounts and my phone if this would be helpful to you|If this would be helpful to you, I am pleased to offer you access to all my accounts and my telephone. I promise to keep in regular communication with you about what I am doing and from today on I will always be at home when I say I will.

I truly wish to make this work and will do whatever is needed. I can clear my schedule out of work so that I could spend as much time with you as possible — as much time as you are comfortable with right now.” Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

4. Accept your spouse’s reaction

A common premise that a partner frequently makes is that as soon as they’ve apologized, their spouse or spouse should stop being sad or mad and give forgiveness to them.

And when this doesn’t happen, the apologizing spouse explodes and says something along the lines of: “I’ve just apologized! What more to you need me to do?! Why can not you just accept it and move on?!”

The thing is, you can ask your husband or spouse for their forgiveness, but you can not FORCE them to forgive you. Whether they do or not is their own choice.

So don’t expect anything from your spouse at the moment.

It’s true, you’re making yourself vulnerable and yes, it may feel excruciating being fulfilled by your spouse’s silence or angry words. This truly is the HARDEST part about saying “I’m sorry”.

Therefore avoid acting defensively AT ALL COSTS, despite the fact that this might be your initial instinct — as it will only undo the good you have just accomplished by apologizing.

And now is definitely not the time to begin pointing fingers and trying to get back at your spouse for whatever they’ve done.

All you can do right now, as hard as it is, is give your partner time to come to terms with your apology and also see for themselves that the adjustments in your behaviour. Forgiveness will come with time. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

 

5. Follow your apology up with positive actions

Saying sorry is vital, but it is not sufficient on its own to cure your partner’s hurt and move. It is the ACTIONS that follow that really do most of the relationship fixing.

Apologies need to get backed up with favorable changes in behaviour, as otherwise your spouse will eliminate faith in you and will end up more hurt and betrayed consequently.

If you have betrayed your partner in some manner, the key is to be ABSOLUTELY transparent with your spouse in future — don’t attempt to hide or cover anything up.

Keep the lines of communication open and be honest about everything — where you’re, what you are doing, who you’re with, what you are spending… EVERYTHING.

This might appear counter-intuitive, however, the simple truth is that your spouse is very likely to be feeling really vulnerable right now, and their trust in you has been ruined. So in order to their hope to be recovered, you have to leave literally no doubts in their mind.

And keep in mind, one big gesture of chocolates and flowers once you have messed up is fine, but it is not going to have the identical effect as continuous small steps to improve your behaviour and reveal your spouse how much you appreciate them.

Even if your spouse doesn’t take your apology straight away, DO NOT GIVE UP. By continuing to demonstrate how sorry you are through loving actions, you’ve got the best hope of regaining their love and trust. Can I Get The Flu Back From My Husband

Cheatproof-your-relationship

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