In the middle of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what generates the perfect relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the previous week that in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it perfect. Can Every Marriage Be Saved
A number of men in the group thought of the cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with items like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these guys, these things felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and simple to maintain.
A number of women considered kitchen appliances, favourite shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had created either between individuals or with things they used in their lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple demands, requiring shelter, food, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what type of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I’m greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is quite humbling once you think about it. Can Every Marriage Be Saved
I have no idea of any others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of no matter how my day has been or the house. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.Can Every Marriage Be Saved
Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?Can Every Marriage Be Saved
Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without requirements. It is the kind of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is now gone. Once the amorous love is gone you create the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize by now your spouse has faults. You know your partner isn’t perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your spouse due to those imperfections instead of in spite of those.
That really is unconditional love.Can Every Marriage Be Saved
The identical thing applies to you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are exactly the exact same. You have flaws. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the flaws and imperfections that people have.
What exactly do you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. All of us clutter our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the desire to let’s problems become bigger than they actually are and rule our own lives.
If you are serious about saving your marriage that the secret is in finding ways to place the psychological mess to a side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is fine to possess flaws and make mistakes. It’s fine to have feelings and thoughts. But above all this is your love you have for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer all of them.
It’s possible to not like your partner or maybe not like what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.
It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Can Every Marriage Be Saved
Final ThoughtsCan Every Marriage Be Saved
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