In the center of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked about what generates the ideal relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week that in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it had been about that relationship that made it ideal. Can A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
A number of men in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television remote, recliner chair, or favourite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these individuals or items was rewarding and simple to maintain.
A range of women considered kitchen appliances, favourite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond that they had created either between individuals or with things they utilized in their own lives. Words like reassuring, dependable, and reliable were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has rather simple needs, requiring shelter, only meals, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home in the night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and more enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, also it is quite humbling when you think about it. Can A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
I have no idea of any others that greet me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from regardless of how my day has been or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?Can A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
Unconditional love is the kind of love which comes without conditions. It’s the type of love that you have for your partner once the romantic, love that is hollywood-style is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you create the transition into “real” love. Real love is love you have for the partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize chances are your partner has faults. You know your spouse is not perfect. You know your spouse makes mistakes but that’s okay, although you know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your spouse due to the imperfections instead of in spite of them.
This really is unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you’re exactly the exact same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine. That is called self-acceptance, and you also hope unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections which people have.
So what do you get from that then? Should we all go outside and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all mess our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our problems become larger than they actually are and dominate our lives.
If you’re serious about saving your marriage that the key is in finding ways to put the psychological mess to a side and let your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to possess flaws and make mistakes. It’s fine to have feelings and thoughts. But over all this is your love you’ve got for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer all of them.
It’s possible to not enjoy your spouse or perhaps not like what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for the spouse and your marriage can stay constant.
It’s time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Can A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
Final ThoughtsCan A Marriage Be Saved Without Counseling
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