In the center of a workshop lately a pertinent question was asked about what creates the perfect relationship. We had been asked to think of a relationship we had with some thing in the previous week which in one’s mind was the perfect relationship, and also to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. Can A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
A number of guys in the group thought of the automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects like their television recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To every one of these men, these things felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with such individuals or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.
A number of women considered kitchen appliances, favored shoes or clothes, old friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their own lives, and the bond which they had created either between people or with things they used in their lives. Words such as reliable, trustworthy, and comforting were used.
When my turn came to identify my ideal connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has rather simple needs, requiring food, shelter, and love. Regardless of how my day has been or what sort of mood I’m in, when I get home in the night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is very humbling once you think about it. Can A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
I have no idea of some others that encircle me enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I’ve been out of regardless of how my day has been or the house. His demands are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?Can A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
Unconditional love is the type of love which comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the amorous, love that is hollywood-style is now gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You realize by now your spouse has flaws. You realize your spouse is not perfect. You understand your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s fine, although you realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You adore your spouse because of the imperfections rather than despite of them.
That really is unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
The same thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You admit that you are exactly the same. You have faults. You aren’t perfect. You know that you make mistakes occasionally, but that is okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also hope unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections which people have.
What exactly can you get from this then? Should we all go outside and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with feelings and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let’s difficulties become larger than they really are and rule our lives.
If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage that the secret is in finding ways to put the emotional clutter to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to possess flaws and make mistakes. It is fine to have thoughts and feelings. But over all this is the love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer all of them.
It’s possible to not like your spouse or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might stay constant.
It is the right time to learn how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Can A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
Final ThoughtsCan A Marriage Be Saved By Separating
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