In the center of a workshop lately a important question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the last week that in one’s mind was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. Can A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
A number of men in the group thought of their automobiles, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of sneakers. To each of these guys, these things felt easy, and comfortable. The relationships they had with such individuals or items was rewarding and simple to keep.
A number of girls considered kitchen appliances, favorite clothes or shoes, older friends, acquaintances, and treasured items in their own lives, and the bond that they had created either between people or with things they used in their lives. Words such as trustworthy reliable, and comforting were used.
When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my own dog. My dog has very simple needs, requiring just meals, shelter, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I am greeted in this kind of authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always eager to see me, and it is very humbling when you consider it. Can A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
I don’t know of some others that encircle me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of the house or no matter how my day was. His demands are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
Therefore What Exactly Is Unconditional Love?Can A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without requirements. It’s the type of love that you have for the partner once the amorous, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the amorous love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You know chances are your spouse has flaws. You know your spouse isn’t perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is okay, although you know your partner makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your partner due to the imperfections as opposed to in spite of them.
This really is unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
The identical thing applies for you however in looking at your spouse’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You’ve got faults. You aren’t perfect. You know you make mistakes occasionally, but that is fine. That’s called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to conquer the flaws and imperfections that people have.
So what do you get from that then? Should we all go out and get puppies to teach us something about unconditional love? Perhaps there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all mess our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our issues become larger than they actually are and dominate our lives.
If you are serious about saving your marriage that the key is in finding methods to place the emotional clutter to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It’s okay to have faults and make errors. It is fine to have feelings and thoughts. But over all this is your love you’ve got for your spouse, the love you’ve got for one another. And love can conquer them all.
It’s possible to not like your partner or perhaps not enjoy what they have been doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage is at but still love your spouse. The love you have for the spouse and your marriage can stay constant.
It is the right time to understand how to reconnect with your life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Can A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
Final ThoughtsCan A Marriage Be Saved After Emotional Affair
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