In the middle of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked about what creates the perfect relationship. We were asked to develop a relationship we had with something in the previous week which in one’s head was the ideal relationship, and to think of exactly what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. Can A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, older friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and easy. The relationships they had with these individuals or objects was rewarding and easy to keep.
A range of women believed kitchen appliances, favored shoes or clothes, older friends, neighbours, and cherished items in their lives, and the bond that they had created either between people or with items they utilized in their own lives. Words such as trustworthy, reliable, and reassuring were used.
When my turn arrived to identify my perfect connection, I thought of my own dog. My dog has quite simple demands, requiring shelter, food, and love. Regardless of how my day was or what kind of mood I’m in, if I get home at night and I am greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and more ardent fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it is very humbling once you consider it. Can A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
I have no idea of some others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been out of the house or regardless of how my day has been. His demands are few, yet he gives a lot. I call this unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
Therefore What Is Unconditional Love?Can A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
Unconditional love is the kind of love that comes without conditions. It’s the type of love that you have for the partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is now gone. Once the amorous love is gone you make the transition to “real” love. Real love is love you’ve got for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect.
You understand by now your partner has faults. You realize your spouse isn’t perfect. You realize your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that is fine, although you know your spouse makes mistakes sometimes. You still love them. You love your partner because of those imperfections as opposed to in spite of them.
This really is unconditional love.Can A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
The identical thing applies for you however in taking a look at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You’ve got faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that is okay. That is called self-acceptance, and you also expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.
What exactly can you get from that then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there’s a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with emotions and thoughts, trials and tribulations, and there’s the temptation to let our issues become bigger than they actually are and dominate our lives.
If you’re seriously interested in saving your marriage that the secret is in finding methods to put the psychological mess to one side and allow your unconditional love come through. It is okay to have faults and make mistakes. It’s okay to have thoughts and feelings. But over all this is the love you have for your partner, the love you’ve got for one another. And love will conquer them all.
It’s possible to not like your partner or not enjoy what they are doing and still love them. It’s possible to not like where your own life or your marriage are at but still love your spouse. The love you’ve got for your spouse and your marriage might remain constant.
It’s time to understand how to reconnect with your own life purpose and learn to love unconditionally.Can A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
Final ThoughtsCan A Marriage Be Saved After Drug Addiction
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