When confronting a marriage crisis, This is certainly one of the most common questions spouses ask: How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband 

How can I save my marriage if my partner does not wish to help find an answer…?

How do I succeed I am attempting to save my marriage on my own…?

It’s a typical enough story: one partner leaves, the other remains. One remains “in love”, the other is not unclear. Whatever it is that’s caused a couple to be apart, the 1 person who remains bears the prospect, uncertainty, fear, desire, hope of rescuing their marriage’ ALONE.

Considering that there are two people causing the overall well being and health of a marriage, shouldn’t both of you be present to actually decide to try and save it? Or, worse, when it’s his, or her, their fault shouldn’t he, she, they’re the ones to make amends? You’re just the victim here, afterall!

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Photo by Trym Nilsen on Unsplash

 

How To Save Your Marriage On Your Own How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

The first thing you need to understand is, if you wish to rescue your marriage and if you find yourself alone in this need, waiting for the other partner to make the initial move would be the start of the ending.

If you’re seeking someone to blame or someone else to put the emotional and physical work in to saving the marriage, again, it is going to fail. How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

The belief that the responsibility lies with another individual is a self-defeating attitude. It propagates the impression that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you should stand and watch what comes your way.

NOT true!

There is still something you are able to DO. Even in your solitude, and isolation, you CAN save your marriage.

How…?

Let us start first by examining what it means to be on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. It is part of our genetic make up to become social creatures and develop connections with other people, whether friendships or romantic interest. How we connect with others of how we interact with individuals, and the nature is a fundamental aspect of development that is psychological and personal. How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

The paradox is that as we grow older in companionship, trust, the love and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us happy human beings. Ideally, the older human person should have developed a sense of confidence self-awareness and self-esteem as she or he reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we view the world, flaws and all. These make up part of difficulties and our personal shelter amidst challenges. This is called SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, many people enter into adult life without even being conscious of this gorgeous, human truth. We may have experienced abandonment in our childhood or been disappointed by our intimate relationships.

whatever it is, it has caused to change from appropriate adult development to fears of abandonment and the inability to find that we are able to stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many of us enter marriages and relationships with the hope, dream and plan that we would never be lonely. We {invest so much in our spouses and loved ones, focusing our entire beings on them and relying on them to make us happy and secure. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own toxin.

Subconsciously, we project the duty of our life pleasure on the other person, eloquently sidestepping taking responsibility for destiny and our own life happiness.

Problems develop when a partner indicates some kind of dissatisfaction with the relationship or the expectations placed upon them, and when they do so we panic. Our fears kick in when our partner leaves. When something goes wrong with our marriages, it’s very easy for us to put the blame of the other person for having made us miserable.How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

So as to save your marriage when you are the one doing it, the key is a paradigm shift the important thing is to change your attitude and focus. Stop focusing on your spouse – stop the blaming, stop the inaction.

Take a good look at yourself and what you can do in this moment. You can NOT restrain your partner’s feelings, attitude and reactions, but you can control your own. You can always go from fearing abandonment to actually taking responsibility for yourself and your happiness.

This is where the human truth about self-actualization comes in. Know, internalize and adapt this on your own. Learn it. It will spell the difference not just in your marriage but in YOU.

An entire human being is easy to love. A happy person attracts happiness. In starting with yourself, you can move from being an clingy, difficult person to a person who can offer an environment of security, wisdom, trust and communication.

If each of you have the ability to self-sustain when it comes to taking responsibility for your own lifetime happiness, you both have much baggage and more real love to bring in the relationship. Your motivation changes from being one of fear to being one of authentic love.

Try these tips to start your own personal transformation and lead your marriage to success rather than beat yourself up in desperation:How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

  • Breathe…
  • Smile…
  • Let go…
  • Believe that reconnection is possible…
  • See a counselor for YOURSELF not only for your marriage
  • Examine your part in contributing to the issues in your marriage
  • Forgive yourself…
  • Change…
  • Look after your health, beauty, and well-being…

For all you know, your partner (and you) may just rediscover the person they first fell in love with and more. For all you know, this is the type of you that would enable your partner initiate communication and to return. When that happens, you have every opportunity to sit down with him or her, talk about your motivations, feelings and plans. You can even get to the issues surrounding your marital difficulties and actually begin taking steps to work them through. How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

In being open and older, you could provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once again. With all the confidence and sincerity you have gathered, take these measures. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or difficulties, find it to continue loving your partner and showing him or her that you do. How To Save A Marriage With An Alcoholic Husband

Through small, subtle acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t need to be gestures, they just have to be sincere. And coming out of the new you.

You might be making!

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