When facing a marriage crisis, This is one of the most common questions spouses ask: Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles 

Can I save my marriage if my partner doesn’t want to help find an answer…?

How do I succeed I am trying to save my marriage by myself…?

It is a standard enough story: one partner leaves, the other remains. One remains “in love”, the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that has caused a couple to be apart, the 1 person who remains bears the potential, fear, doubt, desire, hope of rescuing his or her marriage’ ALONE.

Considering there are just two different people causing the overall health and well being of a marriage, shouldn’t both of you be present to actually try and rescue it? Or, worse, if it’s his, or her, their fault so shouldn’t he, she, they be the ones to make amends? You are just the victim here, after all!

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The Best Way To Save Your Relationship On Your Own Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

The first thing you must know is, if you find yourself alone in this desire and if you would like to save your marriage, waiting for the other spouse to make the first move would be the beginning of the end.

Again, it is going to fail if you’re looking for someone to blame or someone else to set the physical and psychological work into saving the marriage. Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

The belief that the responsibility lies with the other individual is a self-defeating mindset. It propagates the belief that there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you should stand and see what’s your way.

NOT correct!

There’s still something that you are able to DO. Even in your loneliness and solitude, you CAN save your marriage.

How…?

Let’s start first by examining what it means to be all on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. It is part of our genetic make up to be social creatures and create connections with other people, whether through friendships or romantic interest. How we connect with others of the way we interact with people, and the character is a basic aspect of development that is emotional and personal. Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

The paradox is that as we grow older in trust the love, companionship, and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us happy human beings. Ideally, the older human person should have developed a sense of self-esteem, confidence and self-awareness as he or she reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we view the world, flaws and all. These make up part of our personal shelter amidst challenges and difficulties. This is called SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, many of us enter into adult life without even being conscious of this gorgeous, human truth. We could have experienced abandonment in our childhood or been disappointed by our romantic relationships.

whatever it is, it has caused to change from appropriate adult development to fears of abandonment and the inability to find that we can stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many of us enter marriages and relationships with the hope, dream and plan that we’d never be lonely. We {invest so much in our partners and loved ones, focusing our whole beings on them and relying on them to make us secure and happy. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own toxin.

Subconsciously, we project the responsibility of our own life happiness on the person, eloquently sidestepping taking responsibility for our own life happiness and destiny.

Problems develop when a spouse indicates some kind of dissatisfaction with the relationship or the expectations put upon them, and if they do so we panic. Our fears kick in, when our partner leaves. If something goes wrong with our marriages, it is extremely easy for us to place the blame of the other person for having made us miserable.Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

So as to save your marriage when you’re the one doing it, the key then is a paradigm shift, meaning, the key is to change your mindset and focus. Stop focusing on your partner – stop the blaming, halt the inaction.

Take a good look at yourself and what you can do in this moment. You can definitely NOT control your partner’s feelings, attitude and reactions, but you can control your own. You can always go from fearing abandonment to really taking responsibility for yourself and your own happiness.

This is where the human truth about self-actualization comes in. Understand, internalize and adapt this on your own. Learn it. It will spell the difference not only in your marriage but in YOU.

A human being is not difficult to love. A happy person brings joy. In beginning with yourself, you can move from being an unhappy hard person to a person who can provide an environment of safety, wisdom, trust and open communication.

If each of you are able to self-sustain when it comes to taking responsibility for your life happiness, you both have less bags and much more genuine love to bring in the relationship. Your motivation shifts from being one of fear to being one of real love.

Try these tips to start your Personal transformation and lead your marriage to success, rather than beat yourself up in desperation:Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

  • Breathe…
  • Smile…
  • Let go…
  • Believe that reconnection is possible…
  • See a counselor for YOURSELF not only for your marriage
  • Examine your part in contributing to the issues in your marriage
  • Forgive yourself…
  • Change…
  • Look after your health, beauty, and well-being…

For all you know, your spouse (and you) may just rediscover the person they first fell in love with and more. For this is the kind of you that would allow your partner initiate communication and to come back. When that occurs, you have every opportunity to sit down with them, discuss your motivations, feelings and plans. You may even get to the issues surrounding your marital difficulties and actually begin taking steps to work them through. Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

In being open and mature, you could provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once more. With sincerity and all the confidence you have gathered, take these measures. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or difficulties, find it in you to continue showing him or her that you do and loving your spouse. Can This Marriage Be Saved Articles

Through small acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t have to be gestures, they simply have to be sincere. And coming from the new you.

You could be making mistakes that will endanger your union recovery!

You can not afford to provide your marriage 50 percent…

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